Posted: 14/02/2011 at 17:52
I think that at 2 and a half its natural for children to learn that life is full of choices. Like me asking my son what T-shirt he wants to wear today, or what colour to paint the picture ect. I think problems begin with the ways you say things like asking him if he 'wants' to go out...well youre giving him a choice really aren't you by asking him if he wants to go out..to which he says he'd rather draw. I don't see a problem in him telling you theres something else he'd rather do because you gave him the option iyswim so I don't see the point in getting worked up about it.It would be different if you said to him 'its time to go out daddy needs to go to the shops' for him to say no and refuse to go.
With regards to the potty training, I'm not there yet myself as my son is only 14m and I'm looking to introducing it soon. Maybe if he likes decisions and making choices take him out to mothercare and ask him what potty he likes, and maybe ask him to choose some big boy pants? If you give him the choice then he may change his mind about staying in nappies because hes found these really cool pants the HE chose if that makes sense.
It can be hard when you split from a partner as when you previously worked as a unit and came to decisions together, its really easy for you to lose 'sync' and get agitated when something you see as so rudimentary and common sensical to be dismissed or contradicted by your ex. I;d advise you to ask your partner if she has tried letting him make the decisions about potty training and maybe get her to come with you to chose the pants (if you have the ability to go out together) and if you form a united front and maybe set out some routine rules...like asking her what he does in the morning at hers and when does she put him on the potty, maybe say things like 'well why dont we try puttinghim on in the morning at 7am' and maybe get a sticker chart? If hes a little smarty hell enjoy counting the stickers to claim a prize and all kids love rewards!!
I wish you the best of luck! and stick around, were not that bad once you get to know us!! xx