Well, it's finally happened, after counting down for 3 months, my hb has gone away today with his job for 6 months :\( Although I knew it was coming it's harder than I thought. I'm just going to miss him so much. I'm hopefully going to be able to go out to him at least once but that's not certain yet and the worst thing of all is that communicating, at least for the first bit, is going to be really hard, so we won't even be able to chat. Grrrrr to the forces.

Sorry, am just being really self indulgent, but it helps to get it out.

We had one last month of ttc - I ov earlier this week. Hope so much that it's worked otherwise month 9 next month will turn into month 15 - do not pass go, do not collect ??200. :\( Slightly nervous in case it has worked as I'd have to do the first 6 months of pg on my own, but I've got lots of friends and family around and getting on a bit in age so the sooner the better really!

Anyway, I'm going to stop rambling on now. You girls are so lovely and just wanted to vent if that's ok.

x

P.S. I won't say where he is as the military is a small world, this is an unusual posting and we're being v secret squirrel about ttc.

Oh hun so sorry to hear that. Maybe you will be lucky this time round. Big hugs. Good luck. Filo x

Oh Daisy Girl, I really feel for you. It must be so tough and I think you're absolutely brilliant for remaining so positive.

Keeping everything crossed that it worked for you hon and sending big hugs and positive vibes.

Koi xx

oh hun really feel for you, well hopefully you've done it this month and he's gonna have something amazing to look forward to when he gets back.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Hey hun, ima fellow forces widow (pardon the pun!) so know how u feel!!! Hubby had been away for 6 months this yr also, and has only been home for 2 wks after another 2months away very frustrating when ur ttc, not sure if u feel like me, but upsets me how u have no control over ur own life, if they decide there going youve got to put everything on hold!!!! Hubbie is away again for 2months in january, so we had this month do try again and am happy to say im now pg (got caught the wk he came home!!!!) so dont give up hun, it can happen, we managed it 7 months later!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you for your replies everyone, you're so lovely. Feeling sad today because I just want to pick up the phone and give him a call and can't. Have got lots and lots of things organised over the next few weeks though and I'm really going to try and book some fun things for January which can be quite bleak anyway.

Have just had my first day 21 blood test, so at least feel as if I'm doing something even though our ttc is on hold. Fingers crossed I don't need a day 1-5!!

Woomummy - it's so nice to hear from a fellow force wife / widow. It is so hard isn't it? We've still never lived together full-time because of the job and it does get both of us down. When hb is back though we're going to live together full-time for the first time so that is something to really look forward to. In fact every day he's away is a day nearer to us living together, so not all bad. :\)

P.S. Meant to say ****Congratulations Woomummy****!!! So pleased for you. You give me hope!

Hi babes - I just wanted to say hi and say that I hope you have done it this month so that he has a fantastic suprise to come back to...he'll be back before you know it.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I also know how u feel Daisy Girl, my husband was in the forces (I have had many stints alone) and only recently came out, and now we are ttc. Have faith and hope its worked this time and if not stay on here until he's back and keep spirits up. x

Thanks for the congrats hun!!!

I know its really hard, and i dont think anybody could even begin to understand how it its....hubby was in afghanistan last crimbo, so really looking forward to this one!!! The worse part is the kiddies, i feel so bad on my boys sometimes, hes never been here for any of their bdays, and i do feel like there missing out, weve had the discussion and we have a pact that hel b out by the time this peanut turns one!!! Weve always said when it effects the boys its time...and it does my eldest has a really rough time when he goes now, and its not fair on them, spec as he starts school soon. I guess what doesnt kill us makes us stronger eh, youl get through it hunny, and u never know, u may have a peanut starting to grow already!!! Really hope youve done it hun, all the luck int he world, kim xxxxxxxxxxx

hi Daisy Girl, sorry to hear oh away already, the girls at my work keep telling me to keep an ice cube tray in the freezer of wee samples of oh's swimmers for when my he is away!! if only it was that easy!
i have the opposite prob when it comes to communications with oh, when oh is away on subs we can't verbally comunicate at all, but i get to send 40 words a week in a family gram, which is read by not just oh, but the person at the base who opens it, the one who okays it for transmission, the one who transmits it, the one who recieves it, the captain to say okay for seaman to get it and finnally oh!!!! So i make sure i put in naughty things all the time! LOL you 've got to give them something to think about when they are stuck in a tin can for up to 4 months!! and for all my effort i get nothing in return cause they are not alloud to transmit out of sub!
luckily he has not been away at sea since x-mas 04 cause of the bloomin course he has just finished in portsmouth but i just know they will post him away next summer when he finishes his next course in plymouth. Just like woomummy said oyu have no control over your life cause of their jobs. like you i have never really actually lived with my husband of nearly 3 years for more than 3 weeks at a time ( some womens dreams not mine)
Wishing you the most luck in the world that you get a BFP this cycle, it would be the best news for you both,
take care and try to enjoy crimbo, love fi
Ps Congratulations Woomummy, have a great preg, love fi

bless you hun. I have my fingers crossed for you. My hub is in the forces and when i was having my first child i spent 3 months by myself whilst he went off too sea.We had only been married 3 weeks when he went. It's hard but if you have friends and family it helps a little. Good luck hun

Thank you for your messages - isn't it lovely that people who haven't even met can make each other feel so much better, you really have all made this first day much easier than it could have been.

Amazing how many of us are in the same boat - it does help to know others do it too and feel the same way, even though I obviously wouldn't wish it on anyone. I suppose the up side is that absence really does make the heart go fonder.

I've actually just had a text from oh to say he's arrived safe and sound. Didn't think his phone would work, so a text every so often will be a huge bonus.

Fiandrup you did make me laugh about your messages to hb- I can totally see how tempting it must be to put all sort of things in them!! Know just what you mean about giving them things to think about, I'll be doing just the same! Must be so hard having no communication at all though - I don't envy you that.

Really have got fingers and toes crossed for this month, it would be perfect timing but if it doesn't happen I'm just going to try and look on the bright side and drown my sorrows over Christmas with wine and chocolate (I swear I'll have gained 2 stone by the time we actually conceive!).

Awwwwwwwwwww Daisy Girl. So sorry to hear your tale of woe. My heart goes out to you. I get really sad when my oh goes away for 5 days on a stupid golf holiday!!!! When i'm Queen, i am banning golf holidays!!!!!!!!!!

You sound a really lovely positive person so i am wishing you all the luck in the world that you have fallen this month. The 6 month will fly by and then when he comes home, your new little one will only be three months off arriving!!! How exciting. Please keep us posted and keep us company. We need more sunshine in this cold and rain lots of love, bluebird xxxx

Awwwwwwwwwww Daisy Girl. So sorry to hear your tale of woe. My heart goes out to you. I get really sad when my oh goes away for 5 days on a stupid golf holiday!!!! When i'm Queen, i am banning golf holidays!!!!!!!!!!

You sound a really lovely positive person so i am wishing you all the luck in the world that you have fallen this month. The 6 month will fly by and then when he comes home, your new little one will only be three months off arriving!!! How exciting. Please keep us posted and keep us company. We need more sunshine in this cold and rain lots of love, bluebird xxxx

Thank you Bluebird, that is such a lovely post. Well, we've done the first weekend and it wasn't too awful, though I've missed hb like mad. Have spent the whole time thinking ooooh I must tell hb that and realising I can't - not sorted more than a quick 5 min phone call yet.

As I've said in another post I had a bit of brown cm yesterday, which was only day 22 so v early for the start of af. Thought I'd had more this morning so went to the loo but was just clear cm and have had no brown / red cm at all today. Have convinced myself it was implantation bleeding and getting far too excited because realistically, after 8 months, I know how many times I've got my hopes up before and been disappointed. You never know though and what perfect timing it would be....

*Slaps own face and tells self to calm down*

So nice to have you all here to go on to about these things - normally drive hb mad, but not going to mention anything until I know one way or the other because not fair to get his hopes up when he's so far away in case they're dashed again.

Lots of love and babydust to you all and if this isn't our month I'm sure I'll hang around if only to give moral support to everyone else!!

xxx