I'm a NICU nurse and I'm going an assignment on antenatal experiences and I'd love to pick your brains! (They may be baby brains but they still hold lots and lots of valuable information!).

I'm interested to know what your hopes, excitements, thoughts and fears were/ are as you went/ go for your 20 week scan? What did you see as the purpose of this scan and did the reality meet your expecttaions?


[Modified by: Wanna-Bump on 23 November 2009 14:59:27 ]

Hi WannaBump

I'll be honest - I saw the 20 week scan as a major milestone and I was scared to believe that I really was pregnant until I had had the scan

We had a MC last year. 2nd time around, I was obviously thrilled to get my BFP, but petrified I would miscarry again. The pregnancy started with quite a few bouts of bleeding, the last set being around 14 weeks. I pretended to be happy about the PG, but inside was not investing emotionally in the baby or letting myself believe it was really happening until the scan revealed that all was ok

I knew someone who discovered at the 20 week scan that their baby's heart had severe problems and that it would not survive for much longer. Maybe this was at the back of my mind

I think I felt I was being realistic and preparing myself for the worst just in case. I am a natural optimist, but didn't want the hurt of losing something that i was already attached. I barely told anyone and wore big jumpers to hide my growing bump.

The last 9 weeks since the 20 week scan have been totally different. I feel content, elated and excited. I guess it's a shame that I didn;t really feel this for the first 20 weeks, but we all have our own coping mechanisms and that was mine

The sonographer was fabulous - she talked constantly rather than there being any ambiguous silences, and she discussed every aspect of our healthy baby as she went through the motions

I have no idea if this is the kind of info you were looking for, but thought I'd share!

Good luck with the assignment

Goldilocks
29+3

Thank you for sharing Goldilocks!! I'm so glad that you're now able to enjoy your pregnancy and wish you all the best for the arrival of your little one!

I wasn't looking for any information in particular so your story was great!I 'd be interested to know if other people saw it as a similar milestone, perhaps primarily as an opportunity for them and their partner to see their baby again and maybe find out the sex or perhaps as a thing that was mainly for the medics to check that baby was growing ok?

Thanks in advance!

This is my first baby and my 20 week scan is on the 4th December. Time is dragging as i am so impatient.

I am worried there will be a problem with baby! But i am so excited to find out the sex so we can decide on a name and start decorating nursery!

I think also it will make it more real for me. I think leading up to the 20 week scan is a scary time as there are so many things that can go wrong and ppl tell you so many horror stories! It will be nice to get through this and know we have a healthy baby girl/boy and i can now relax x

My 20 week scan is Thursday and I refuse to buy anything for baby until that scan is complete and I know that everything is ok. So I too see this scan as a major milestone and providing everything is ok, the first time you can really relax about the pregnancy and really believe that you are actually going to have a baby.
xxxx
20+1

Hi, hope I can add something of use for you. We'd been trying for a baby for about a year before I got my BFP. During this time quite a few of my friends had fallen pregnant, ironically two of them had gone on to have baby's with 'Edwards syndrome', both found out at their 20wk scan that something wasn't right but it wasn't confirmed til much later.

Another friends baby was diagnosed as having complications that were not compatible with life (according to the sonographer the baby's brain was developing outside his skull), obviously devastating news again discovered at 20wk scan, however due to the couple's ethical views they declined termination and carried on, he was born in Aug without any serious complications (the only thing they can find wrong with him is he is short-sighted).

Given this scenario we had had many discussions prior to the scan about 'what if' something was found to be wrong, what would we do? How would we cope, would we terminate the baby if things were seriously wrong?

All of this coupled with my working environment (I work as A&E nurse and the main gynae complication we see is m/c) meant that I was sure I would prob m/c and if not then there would more than likely be a problem found with my baby, so going int the 20wk scan I was very nervous. As others have said it is a definate milestone, I didn't dare prepare anything for the baby until we'd passed this milestone.

Our sonographer was amazing, I did explain my fears to him before he started scanning and once he had seen everything he needed to he described what he saw and what he was looking for, confirming everything was normal. It was such a relief that all was ok, we were instantly excited and on the spur of the moment we changed our minds and asked if we could find out the sex. Until that moment I had denied that I was carrying a little person.

The scan itself cannot be underestimated. Had I fallen pregnant prior to this year I probably would have looked on the scan differently, with more excitement and possibly once I had had the 12 wk scan I may have been more relaxed about things.

Hope this helps you with your assignment - tricky topic!!!

Liz (33+4)
xxx

I have mine tomorrow and am excited and terrified all at once. I am seeing it as an opportunity to bond more with our baby (we hope to find out the sex). However, I am also remembering the main purpose behind the scan and am worried about anything untoward showing up. So I feel very torn at the moment x

K 20+1 x

Hello

I had my 20 week scan last week. I didn't sleep much the night before.

The main concern is obviously the baby and its health- is it developing normally, are the organs and bones growing correctly and does all seem to be well.

The second issue is that its been 2 long months since you've seen baby at the 12 week scan and not everyone feels movement before the 20 week scan, so there is fear and excitement combined at this stage.

For us it was also an opportunity to find out the sex which is allowing us to bond and connect with baby in a way that feels so special now.

In terms of a sonographer, you want one who is understanding, patient and who is prepared to explain what they are looking at and why. You don't expect a running commentary but total silence is so utterly nerve racking. We had a fabulous sonographer who was patient and took her time and ran through everything with me once she had completed her checks.

Its a huge milestone in pregnancy and while medical teams deal with it everyday, for every mum to be its an extraordinary moment in their lives and its lovely when the hospital staff have at least some sense of that.

Good luck with your studies

Me and my husband didnt think we would be able to conceive, when we got our BFP we were both very very shocked, thrilled and scared all at the same time. For the first 12 weeks my husband refused to get excited, the reason we didnt think we would conceive is I had a very very intense bout of cancer treatment that finished 20 months before I got pregnant and although the docs had said yes we could try they werent overly hopeful.

After our 12 week scan we relaxed, got married at 17+6 and went on honeymoon. But in the back of my mind I was petrified that all the toxins that had got rid of the cancer they werent sure was treatable would hurt the baby and that at 20 weeks we would find out our baby had problems.

We went for our 20 week scan on Friday 3rd July at 20+5 after getting back from honeymoon the day before. We had decided we wanted to know the sex and everyone (familywise) was so focussed on this. We however just wanted to know they were healthy first.

We had a lovely midwife scan me,who I told about our fears and she was pleased for us that we had come so far as her daughter had had a cancer diagnosis young and she was also in the not sure if it will happen for her camp. She told us she would check everything the fact that she was quiet did not mean there was something wrong and she would go through everything at the end and if she could she would tell us pink or blue.

She went through everything it took ages and she told us we had a little monkey as he kept covering up body parts that she wanted to look at but that it appeared we had a healthy little boy and showed us each organ in turn! I nearly burst into tears and my hubby got very very excited then

Our 20 week scan was to put our mind at rest, it settled the fears we had that being ill in the past had hurt our baby and let us get fully excited about being a mummy and daddy. Now all I need is for him to get his lazy bum in gear and make an appearence!

Em 41 + 1 x x x

im absolutely petrified... my 20 week scan isnt until 22nd december.. i too wont be buying anything until the 20 week scan. Its so horrible not knowing if little bean is ok in there from 12 weeks until 20 weeks. xx

We saw the main purpose of the 20 week scan as making sure that everything was alright with Baby. There is a history of spina bifida in hubby's family, so we were naturally concerned about this. Also at the 12 week scan we were told that the baby's gut was still protruding into the umbilical cord, so we wanted to ensure that had resolved itself.

Luckily all was well!

We found out the sex, which was one of the most amazing experiences ever (although we saw this as an added bonus rather than the main reason for the scan).

I was really nervous beforehand and felt amazing afterwards. One of the best bits was when the sonographer was checking for cleft palatte and she zoomed right in on the baby's nose and mouth - it was so tiny and perfect! It really helped me view the baby as a tiny person rather than an abstract concept.

I wish I could get scanned every week! :lol:

x