Sorry for long delay since my last post I have suffered immensley with crippling pain, meaning I had a few nights waking screaming, my PMA disappeared and hubby struggled as he felt useless to help. BUT my gp changed my meds they took a while to tinker with but I can finally say I have had 3 good nights, and after going back to docs yesterday he has increased my dose of one of my pills to one at night (why I was sleeping) and 1 in day so I have been pain free for about 85% of yesterday, which is a MASSIVE improvement on constant pain and the other 15% is very managable. Im so pleased I was in so much pain at one point I cried with every step to Dylans room in the middle of the night then sobbed as I couldnt pick him up. Hubby has been doing the night feeds for weeks as I couldnt get out of bed for the pain and I felt like the worst mummy in the world! But the past 3 nights he hasnt had a night feed so I have been getting up between 6-7 everyday and feeding and dressing him and I feel like a good mum again, one who can look after her little man, and a lot less guilty on hubby, not that he said a word and kept telling me it wasn't my fault and I was a good mum.
Yesterday I actually enjoyed (yes I am well aware I am a weirdo! :lol
but im kicking its arse now
not sitting and allowing it to grow. The oncologist has started me on steroids to reduce the swelling of radiotherapy and reduce effects of pain caused by this. My skins sensitive already, which is weird as it didnt start till much later last time 4 weeks into a 6 week higher dose course :? but its ok, not sore just starting to tingle like its burnt (which it is) and quite warm to tough in certain spots.
I go every week day for 2 weeks, then I think they let the swelling settle for a time (not sure how long yet) then will give me another MRI (I think there are more pics of my insides recently than there are of Dylan and im obsessed in taking pics of my gorgeous little man!!!) depending on results of this will decide whether they are operating or just giving me chemo. I want an operation, the other bits are apparently so negligible they arent causing symptoms and the chemo should either shrink them right back or get rid of them for a time completely so im keen for them to dig out the one in my neck, as although the chemo will have some effect on this too its unlikely to get rid completely for a while. I'd like to be in same situation I was last time in terms of getting rid (I know this time it will return but they couldn't tell me it wouldn't last time!) But look how long I went then without problems and what I achieved in the space between, and then if my body can take it when it comes back I will do it all again!! ANYTHING to stay with my gorgeous family as long as possible!
Im going to so shine http://shine.cancerresearchuk.org/ in april, with my mum sister and best friend although I have several other who are interested in joining me, and as far as I can see the more that take part the more money is raised! Would have done race for life but I actually cant say I will be fit to run but walking should be ok, if i'm recovering from surgery I have told my best friend she can push me in a wheelbarrow :lol: Haven't done a sponsor page yet but I will be cheeky when I have and add it to this thread
Right i've waffled on enough :lol: got to get hubby up we have to tidy before we leave for christie's as we have Steven's best friend coming over from Egypt.
Speak soon ladies much love
Em x x x x
