Stress about Routines or Not???

21/06/2011 at 10:51
Hi Ladies, I know some of you lovelies are having fabulous sleeps as babies are going for hours whilst others are more night owls , are any of you stressing about getting routines under way or not???
Seren is very good, hardly crys, sleeps after feeds and playmat in day and is going roughly most nights every 3 hours, it does make me feel thou when reading that some babies are going 7 hours that I am doing something wrong, when I know logically that to think that way is silly as every baby is different....anyone else feel the same?
Seren is only tiny still 8lb 9 and is taking around 650/750 ml a day which is the correct amount for her age (5 wks today). We do bath and massage and bottle around 7pm and put her in gro bag since last week, also have slumber bear at night so Im trying to get things associated with night, I feed in dark, with night light and ditto for changing at night and in the day everything is light and noisy, I even hoover around her, so dont think I can do much else, I know she is very young yet so trying not to stress about the routine thing too much as yet, just wondered if I am alone in doubting myself... sorry its a long whinge xxx
21/06/2011 at 12:13
No you're not alone, I think I mentioned that in another thread, in fact you're way more into a routine than I am that's for sure! I tried to bath Holland at bedtime the other night and I got an hour of screaming for it! Mind you she is only 19 days today so a little early. I am struggling at the moment to get her to BF correctly so I am putting all my effort into that for now..... It sounds to me like you're doing a fab job. x
21/06/2011 at 12:22
Ah BoB thank you, we have been lucky that Seren loves bathtime, really enjoys it, but I know it takes some babies a while to enjoy. I am FF so admire you for BF, must be hard work! I think I am just doubting myself a lot as its all new and unchartered territory, as I still dont know what Serens Cries mean yet, its trial and error. I hope you get good news about Hollands tests hun xx
21/06/2011 at 12:42
All new to me too! I know you are older and you probably feel like me alot (I am 38 and Holland is my first), that we should know what to do! Ridiculous I know but I do beat myself up about it. I also have no clue what Holland needs when she cries yet, but sometimes I don't think she does either! I usually just try the nappy/burp/food/sing route. BFing is hard and I doubt myself sooooo many times and wonder if she is getting enough etc. I am trying to talk with the lactation consultant again today to see if she has any more advice for me :roll:
21/06/2011 at 13:06
Bless ya honey, as if with just having the baby isnt enough plus BF can be hard on a new mummy too, yes BoB im older too so like you say you think you wil handle evrything better and Im shocked that Im so clueless , and I feel clueless and that makes it all
21/06/2011 at 13:17
Your definitely not alone! All the things you're doing sound great and you'll find your own routine with Seren eventually.

We are in no routine at all at the moment. It changes everyday here depending on what mood DS is in! He wakes up every 3 hours or less through the night too. The only thing that i'm doing at the mo is waking him to feed him before we go to bed at 10.30ish with the hope he'll go longer from then! I'm hoping we'll get into our own little routine eventually but trying not to become stressed about it all and just enjoy him at the mo. I got too hung up on routine last time early on and these baby days go so quickly. I'm just trying to relax and enjoy them more this time. We have no chance of a routine with my little monster's constant feeding anyway!

21/06/2011 at 13:47
Thanks Bliss, thats what I am trying to do, I thought I will do the bath, dark etc but wasnt expeccting LO to sleep so early on and be in a routine, sort of thought about 8 weeks maybe start falling into something, lucky lucky are the lovelies with babies that do so now, but like you say I was trying not to get hung up about it all, I then doubt myself thou when I think Is that the wrong way to be, should I be doing more.... feel better now for chat to you and BoB xxxx
21/06/2011 at 14:49
Well, you are way more organised than me! We re not in a routine and i'm not even trying yet. Aurelia wakes around 3 hours for a feed sometimes 4 but never more and the health visitor says thats fine! We keep things dark at night and no chatting etc and if i get the food into her before she gets too hungry she'll generally go straight back to sleep. Last night was the first night she slept in her crib which meant we were awake more but i think she did well. My health visitor says that she worries when young babues sleep through but i'm not sure whether she was trying to be supportive ot not. I think your doing great.

21/06/2011 at 18:02
I'm trying to get a routine for the evening but I'm usually alone & with a toddler so struggling. Last night he just screamed from 7:30 till 9pm when I gave up & bought him back downstairs. Tonight he's been screaming from 7;30ish till 9:30. I put him to bed at 10pm but took till 10:30 & several trips upstairs till he fell asleep.

I figure it's something he has to learn so trying not to pressure it too much. It's hard though, I feel like I'm doing something wrong as dd was totally different. She took to the routine immediately with no trouble & slept thru the night shortly after so I assumed he'd be similar but he's the total opposite!!

Mummy to 2 beautiful children and one on the way !
22/06/2011 at 03:56
Well I'm just rubbish! Freddy has no routine other than 4 hourly feeds. He's awake for around 1.5 hours to feed, play etc then gets put back down and sleeps until he's due his next feed (on a good day anyway!). The thing is he keeps this with his night feeds too so when he wakes we're up for an 1.5 so I think I need to start putting him to bed, its just so difficult with the other 3 to see to!
22/06/2011 at 19:09
I sorta have a routine but its nothing set in stone and Gnracie occassinaly mixes things up abit! think she likes to remind me whose boss lol she has slept through a couple of times and even on a 'bad' night will have 5-6 hrs... What i have noticed is she feeds more frequently in the afternoon so whether thats her filling up ready for the night im not sure? i also do bath bottle bed and have done since day one but its not something im hung up on and if for whatever reason i cant bath her one day then thats fine - we'll all get there xxx



23/06/2011 at 02:55
I'm another one who has no routine whatsoever yet! I never know whether Peter will be awake, asleep, happy, grumpy or feeding at any time of the day! I've tried keeping track but it seems to change daily. I'm not too stressed cos generally he seems a pretty content little baby (must be happy living in chaos like me and his dad!) but now he's 7 weeks I'm thinking I should start doing some sort of bedtime routine at least. My question is how?! Those of you who are doing the bath, feed, bed thing - what do you do if your LO is crying, asleep or in the middle of feeding when it's time to do the bath? Do you just wait for a bit. If they're asleep, do you wake them? Help! I'm so clueless. Never realised quite how disorganised I actually am until I had a baby!
23/06/2011 at 09:53
Thanks ladies, Im not as stressed about it now, as we are still going with the flow with LO and Im more chilled about it all now. . Koalagirl, we do bathtime anytime from 6pm-8pm depending on feeding time, We are trying to do it before Lo is desperate for food but a few times have given bottle and then left it 1/2 hr and then bath, massage and lavender oil and Lo is sparko, so its just trial and error for us too really, but as soon as Lo gets in proper routine we will be able to know best time to do. Hope that helps a bit, I think its all just guess work at moment for most of us. xx
23/06/2011 at 10:43
i think we all have doubts,
i was ready to throw in the towel a few days ago, i felt like a 100% failure!!
Rebekah has been terrible with her milk the last couple of weeks sreaming, a hormonal teenager :lol: until 2 days ago when it dawned on me she is fussy like ds2 was & prefers the expensive way & wants ready made formula rather than the powder :roll: ds2 at least went about 5/6months before he could tell the difference!
now she's gone from 4hrly feeds to 3hrly feeds, 5oz a time & with the SMA hungry baby stuff (she's 6wks today)
she sleeps at night from around 8/9pm to around 4/5am
the boys were the same but its nothing ive ever done they are just good sleepers like hubby
yet in the day she just cat naps & the house stays a tip untill every one is sleeping soundly (including hubby :lol: ) & then i get it all sorted

the only routine we have is the school run......roll on the summer hols
23/06/2011 at 11:21
What do you do with the lavender oil WW? What do you use? One made for babies?
23/06/2011 at 11:57
BoB its just the Johnsons lavender baby oil, sorry not a specific one. I put that on after bath, I put boots bottom balm on first as a barrier( fabulous cream) and then massage with Oil and at each change thru the night, the last few nights, I put a little oil on legs and arms again and she is sound asleep a lot quicker I have found. Give it a whirl you never know, may work. She doesnt sleep any longer than the 3 hours but it is more sound sleep and not so agitated. Let me know if you try it and if it works for you? xx
23/06/2011 at 13:22
It is so good to hear how we are all getting on, and the thing that comes through the most is that our babies are boss! Grace feeds every 4 hours, and tends to go about 6hrs at night, then a feed and straight back down for another 4. We tried putting her up to her bed at 8pm, after a bath and bottle but we haven't been that successful at the moment. She generally gets her last feed about 9pm and in bed at 10pm the same time as us.

We will get there eventually i am sure, but in the meantime we will keep doing what works best for her on that day!

Like the sound of the lavender oil... will have to try it. Perhaps we should start a thread on what we all use on our lo's so we can benefit from real reviews!

23/06/2011 at 17:10
Oh someone brought me some johnsons nightime stuff maybe I need to look and see if there is some lavender oil in there as I remember it's purple! I will try it on Holland if so. I use Aquaphor on Hollands bum as she already had a nappy rash at 2 weeks due to constant pooping - apparently BFing is like giving them stool softners! I felt like such a bad Mummy as she had a nappy rash so early on, but the aquaphor cleared it straight up and now her bottom looks perfect again
23/06/2011 at 19:36
Koala girl, we do bath, bottle, bed... fortunatley Gracie is quite predictable with feeds so I a able to bath her before she is due, its usually between 6.30 and 7.30... it all depends on what time she has had the feed before that, but its always trial and error, sometimes she is hungry as i am drying her and putting her pjs on so i feed her straight away, other times she just chills for a bit before having the bottle, and somtimes she falls to sleep while having the feed and sometimes i put her down awake and she settles herself, other times she just wont settle, but in the night i make sure i keep everything quiet and dark etc

BOB Gracie had really bad nappy rash at a few days old, i felt dreadful and even rang the docs as her skin had broken, and was red raw, i just caked it in sudocream and also laid her on a towel on her changing mat with nothing on her bottom half to let air get to the area and it soon cleared up - phew!




24/06/2011 at 01:44
Thanks wonderwoman and MummyKate. The bedtime routine thing sounds a bit more achievable now you've described it! Think I will try and a fit it in between 7pm and 9pm depending on what little man is up to and see how that goes.

Peter has also already had nappy rash and I also felt dreadful! Mummy guilt is terrible isn't it? I now do the sudocream thing at every nappy change as otherwise it comes back due to his constant pooing! He also loves his 'no nappy' time but I have to put towels everywhere! :lol:
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