Just came back from shopping.

When I was queueing up in M&S, there was a lady in front of me who turned round, looked at Reiss and said, oh he's having a nice sleep (he wasn't actually but that's not important)

She then went on to say - oh he looks like his daddy - WTF? Sorry, do I know you? She's assuming he looks like his dad because he's not white obviously.

Anyway, then she says to me, what's his dad then - Chinese? Korean? So I said, no actually he's black but the baby's very fair. With that she looked at me with a look of contempt, snorted really loudly and then spun on her heel so her back was to me.

I was gobsmacked - so I said to her 'I'm sorry, is that a problem for you?' to which she said, no I just thought he was Chinese, got all flustered and then just left after she had paid.

I'm so pissed off with people making assumptions about me, my husband, my children because of their narrow minded views.

It also makes me really sad, because this is the future my beautiful children have to face.

Sadly, it's hardly likely to be a one off - I've had quite a few things said to me before about my 'mixed marriage' (oh so you mean a man and a woman then?!) or my 'interacial family' and other stupidness, which I brush off as ignorance, but when it involves my children, as any other mummy would do I'm fiercly protective.

It also upsets me because I'm sick to death of coming up against prejudice - I fought it for years with my eldest, being in a wheelchair, not being able to speak etc and I sometimes feel like telling the whole world to F*CK off! (I mean the whole world apart from my true friends on here and at home of course!)

I know I'm never gonna change the world and I have to take these idiots with a pinch of salt but unfortunately there are a lot more closet (and not so closet) racists out there that we all have to deal with.


Pissed off from pissedofftown, pissedville.:\(

O my god! what a stupid cow! What a stupid thing to say.i hate how people comment Reiss is gorgeous and we all know it some people always feel the need to comment and i agree it pisses me off to hon.
I dont know how anyone can see Reiss looks fringing chinese??!?!?!!?
Needs her eyes testing!
I had a friend who was half black and her hubby was white,they had twins who were white and people always used to comment to her and when she had her 3rd he was much darker skinned and she used to get more comment-she got very upset by this,if i was with her i am not one for biting my tongue as you know i just told them to fuck off.
Everyone is different,and some people always have to comment and i know its easier said than done but youshould ignore them babe.
You have a gorgeous family,all your children are/were beautiful and small minded people who dont matter are just a waste of space.

You are right,you cant change the world-all you can do is make your little part of it better by teaching your little ones to be the best they can and to be open minded.

And let the sad individuals who make themselves look small by making idiotic comments get on with their lives, not affecting you because they have no importance whatso ever.xxx

Big hugs.xxxx

oh my god, I thought those days were long gone, what is it with these narrow minded people get a bloody grip!!!
How dare people even comment no one has the right, those people should just crawl back under their rocks and f off.

All you have to think is that you know your children will grow up proud of who they are and thats all that matters

Oh my god Karen! That is disgraceful! Mixed family??? Is that still some peoples opinion in 2008? How dare she! She probably forgot to wear her kkk mask that day (sorry but it makes me so angry!)

My brother is in a wheelchair also and although he can speak etc and is actually really intelligent, people are constantly stopping in shops and patting him on the head or rubbing his shoulder and asking pityingly "oh, poor love, what's wrong with him?" Drives me mad that people have the nerve. If i'm there i'd say "well some weirdo is patting him like a dog is what's wrong with him!"

I honestly don't know why people feel the need, surely the world should be making progress not back tracking. Reiss is gorgeous, race etc shouldnt even come into it. xxx

OMG KaAren - that is just so rude and offensive! How dare she even comment! You're right to be pissed off! Ignore it though - these people aren't worth the energy!

xx

When I was in London almost ALL of my mates were either Black, Turkish or Mixed race/Duel natonality (I dont know how to say it these days without worring about causing offence) I have mixed race cousins (my Auntie married an African Man) and when I moved here I was SO shocked at the racism. There is one mixed race teen on this estate and the names he was getting called were UNBELIEVABLE! Bearing in mind he was born here! Im more of a 'foreigner' than he is. IMO it is EXTREMELY narrow minded to be like that lady was to you, I mean people breed different breeds of dogs together to make an 'improved ' breed but then turn their noses up at people who choose to breed outside of their own race. You may think why is she comparing people to dogs but TBH I would much rather be around animals than people!

Karen - If your kids are anything like you then they'll be fine. They may be faced with predjudice and ignorent people but Im sure you'll teach them how proud they should be of who they are!! xx xx

OMG!!

[Modified by: brandollarz on December 16, 2008 04:53 PM]

WTF??

[Modified by: brandollarz on December 16, 2008 04:55 PM]

HAPENED!!??

[Modified by: brandollarz on December 16, 2008 04:57 PM]

TO MY MESSAGE!!

[Modified by: brandollarz on December 16, 2008 04:59 PM]



[Modified by: brandollarz on December 16, 2008 05:02 PM]

[Modified by: brandollarz on December 16, 2008 05:04 PM]

Thanks girls. I know I need to remember there are good, non judgemental people in the world as well as the ignorant ones.

Elaine you would never offend me or anyone else for that matter - it doesn't matter that you don't know the latest pc word for black/mixed whatever - the important thing is that you don't care and colour isn't an issue! One of the reasons I would never move back up north is for the reason you've just said - where I was from was pretty much the same, although not always overtly to the face, more behind the hand comments about 'those darkies'! Made your point btw! (10 times I think at last count lol!)

Zoey - you're absolutely right and thank you for your text babes.

Rebecca - it's unbelievable that people think wheelchairs render the user deaf and dumb! Kayles couldn't vocalise, but she had a special machine that she used to put up to her neck to help her talk. If I had a pound for every person that commented on her sounding like a robot I wouldn't be living here! They used to do that patting thing too - soooo annoying! At one point it got on our nerves so much that my dh told Kayles to tell the next person to f*** off! She was only 15 and I wasn't too impressed, but kind of agreed lol!

Thanks again ladies, feeling a bit more upbeat now.xx

oh frig now Im doing it!

[Modified by: karen130770 on December 16, 2008 05:10 PM]

Karen, I cant believe she even had the nerve to say anything!

I am South African and we brought up that black is black and white is white - you shouldnt mix, ok dont judging me just yet, until I was 6 and started school. I was the first year where black children was allowed in white schools, so from then I grew up with black and white kids as friends.

However my parents still had very differant points of view, so I must admit my view point was totally warped. As I went to high school I developed a very strong friendship with a black man and my parents were well should we say not too pleased.

Then my sister announced that she was marrying a coloured man (mixed parents) and they had to just accept it or bugger off. They now understand the black white pink purple or green people are people!

So what I am trying to say is, if my parents can be brought up in appartheit in South Africa and then still accept a mixed relationship now, admittadly it has taken some 20 years, then why cant people who it has been a way of life for donkies.

Ggggggrrrr it makes me mad!!!!!!!

Karen, I cant believe she even had the nerve to say anything!

I am South African and we brought up that black is black and white is white - you shouldnt mix, ok dont judging me just yet, until I was 6 and started school. I was the first year where black children was allowed in white schools, so from then I grew up with black and white kids as friends.

However my parents still had very differant points of view, so I must admit my view point was totally warped. As I went to high school I developed a very strong friendship with a black man and my parents were well should we say not too pleased.

Then my sister announced that she was marrying a coloured man (mixed parents) and they had to just accept it or bugger off. They now understand the black white pink purple or green people are people!

So what I am trying to say is, if my parents can be brought up in appartheit in South Africa and then still accept a mixed relationship now, admittadly it has taken some 20 years, then why cant people who it has been a way of life for donkies.

Ggggggrrrr it makes me mad!!!!!!!

Karen,

I hope you are feeling a lot better now babe - I find it completely shocking that in this day and age people feel the need to express themselves like this.

You have an absolutely gorgeous family and I have no doubt that the boys will grow up with the same attitude and sense of wisdom and fairness that you have shown them that they will be able to discard any of the small-mindedness that ignorant people, like the one you came across today, as you do. People like this woman are narrow-minded and living in the dark ages.

I watched a documentary last night with an interview with Sammy Davis Jnr and I was shocked at how much racial abuse he had to withstand - he could come and perform at the BBC, be paid for it but was then turned away from the Green Room afterwards because of his colour! How disgusting - thank god the world has moved on and improved apart from the nasty piece of work you met!

As you know I spent the last few weeks of my pregnancy in a wheelchair and I can honestly say it was horrendous! The attitude of people towards me changed - the looks that were given to Paul as he pushed me, the pity and suchlike, and the sheer fact that the majority of people started to ignore me as, obviously, being in the wheelchair meant I had lost the use of my brain or voice.

The world is changing (and not before time) Karen but unfortunately it is a slow process and there are always going to be people who forget this - you have a wonderful family and I feel pretty sure that with you and Norm as parents they will go onto bigger and better things and wont come across this narrow-minded minority.

You know I'm not really good with words so I hope all this makes sense and that I havent said anything wrong but I was just so cross for you I had to send you and your boys my love xxx

Well, if Elaine can post that amount of times I suppose twice wasnt bad lol!!!

[Modified by: Tommysmum! on December 16, 2008 06:00 PM]

Of course you're going to be protective of your family thats what us mummy's do and rightly so.
I think its so rude that strangers feel they have the right to make assumptions about our children in any case especially being so naive and offensive.

As for the discrimination Kayles faced my heart goes out to you, we experienced so much prejudice regarding Sienna's disabilities and she was never even home it makes me sick how quick people are to judge......
Sending you some hugs x

You guys bring tears to my eyes. Thank you for your words.

Cooper, South Africa has got to be one of the worst places to grow up regarding apartheid and thank goodness that there are people like you and your sister (and eventually your mum and dad!) that could learn to not always believe what, in this case, the majority of people, including the government told you. Well done you all - I know you weren't looking for a pat on the back, but you are right - if you (and others like you) can overcome apartheid and go on to view people of all colours equal then why can't people who are brought up in a multi cultural society?!

Lee, you are actually very good with words hon. It is so sad that people like Sammy Davis Jr and many, many more people were subjected to such horrendous abuse.

You won't believe some of the things that have happened to Norm - from being spat at as a child when he toured with his football team, to being at a match with someone he viewed as a mate who then started making monkey noises when a black player came onto pitch! When questioned, he said it was ok, it wasn't racist - it was just to put the player off! What crap!

I of course have had my fair share of stoooopidness as well, from both white and black, ignorance is rife in all races sadly.

Diana, disability is still a big no no in this society - like Lee says, you leave your brain behind once in a wheel chair and as for Sienna and her Downs - I'm sure you've heard them all, my particular favourite being - oh they are so loving! Yup, every one of them apparently!

Wow - I'm really on my soap box tonight aren't I?! Better get off it now and go feed my child lol!xx

karen,

its terrible what ppl say esp the older generation!!
i was with a black man for 5 years and the abuse we used to get was awful!! he used to coming in to the shop i used to work in and if i wasnt there (day off etc) he used to get untold abuse of other black people saying he shouldnt be with a white girl but if i was there they wouldnt say anything in the end we broke up but not because of what ppl said to us because he was a controlling arse hole lol