So ladies how was your birth experience? Were you surprised at how well you coped or taken by surprise at how painful it was? Ultimately was it better or worse than you expected.

This was my 3d labour and as my two previous labours were quick, I expected this one to be as well. However, my last labour was a calm experience which I coped very well with, I guess I expected the same this time. Wrong. This was my quickest labour so far and the pain felt "concentrated" like I had 5 hours worth of pain condensed into 30 minutes!

It was over very fast and it felt amazing to have it over and done with and babe in arms so soon, but the pain is still very fresh in my mind- the thought of going through it again is something I won't be rushing to do. Rebecca will be waiting a while before getting a wee brother or sister! :lol:

So ladies, how was it for you?

xxx

Well....

I actually dont know how I feel about my experince yet.... Maybe writing my 'very' long BS will clear up in my mind what happened.

I can comment that because I had an emergency C-section the recovery has been slower then I thought...

I am also a little scared of going though it all again... trying to remain open minded... the only parts I didn't like was actully being cut open & the recovery. (also the fact I was so close to being able to deliver him myself....)

When my BS is up... hope that explains things.... The whole experince was a blur.

So I would say it was confusing for me

What a shame to end up a CS so close to the finish line- looking forward to reading your BS. I love all the birth stories!

My recovery this time has taken longer too.
I had a great pregnancy and got through the birth pretty much Scott free, but since the birth I feel like I have SPD! I'm walking like an old lady and my back and pelvis ache whenever I walk for more than 10 mins or so. Hopefully it won't be too long before I'm back to normal.

as u know i didn't labour this time, with ds, i can wholeheartedly say it was worse than expected!...this time round, cs recovery has been both better and worse than i expected, being my second cs and being an elcs this time i expected recovery to be much lesspainful and quicker...it was definately more painful and i had after pains/contractions this time, which i didn't have(or feel)with ds, but that was down to me really, i refused the morphine this time as i remember last time i was very hazy the first day or so and i wanted to make sure i was completely 'with it' this time, so only had declofenac and cocodamol, also on the first day i tried to do a bit too much too quick (thinking i was superwoman as i felt really well in myself, just a bit sore)and got out of bed 12hours post surgery (finally persuaded the 3rd mw to let me lol), only did it the once though, and then waited til next morning, learnt my lesson!...however, 2 weeks on and i've now been painkiller free for 3days (although had 2 paracetamol yesterday)and feel really well, much better than last time. although, i have a hard grape sized lump under one side of my scar that feels really tender and bruised, mw on tuesday said it might be a haemotoma and they'd keep an eye on it, but then different mw on friday said no she thinks just bruising and discharged me, so no idea what it is now, but it's the only bit of my scar that still hurts, oh and i've been bleeding a bit heavier again (like it was first two days), had mainly just light spotting for a week, but last couple of days i've had nothing during the day and then in the evening it kicks up, but yesterday i had nothing, and then woke up at 5am this morning with loads again, and i honestly don't think i'm doing too much, OH has been a star and is doing everything (cooking, cleaning, looking after ds)...will keep an eye on it, but not even due to see hv for another month now xx

Littlewolf I feel the same as you, my labour was quick so I think the pain was concentrated too, I spent the last half an hour of my labour crying or shouting 'Owwwwwwwwwww!!!!' and like you the pain is to fresh in my mind to add more to my family for a while! I had no pain relief with my first but had a episiotomy and retained placenta which made it awful so didn't know what to expect this time, but although very painful at the end it was amazing, exactly what I wanted and i'm very lucky to have a quick labour without pain relief and no dramas x

I honestly don't know if it was better or worse.. I guess looking back I'm happy with it (much rather a quick labour than a long one), however in the moment it was terrifying since I really thought she was going to be born in the car.

I recovered physically very quickly with my first, but this time around I'm really struggling. It feels like everything 'down there' is broke and I can barely walk on my own.

I really don't know how to feel about my experience, it was all handled very badly for me. My lovely natural water birth turned into me being strapped to the bed, given the drip to 'help speed things up' despite them progressing well and it all ended in an emergency csection due to bubs being brow presentation, something that was missed until I got to 8cms, and she became lodged in my pelvis. So all in all, quite a traumatic time for me and poor h2b who had to stand back and watch.
As they pulled her out they also broke her little arm, something that has me in tears even thinking about but she's a little trooper and is on the mend thank God.
I'm in the process of writing up my (really long!) BS but have to keep stopping as it's all a little to fresh in my head at the minute.
As for future babies, I've been told that they will all be by elective csection due to my pelvis shape and the size they are likely to be (Kacie was 9lb 6oz) so I think I would need to get my head around that before we ever start trying again x

Oh Huni- that sounds like an ordeal!
Sending healing thoughts to you and baby Kacie xxx

Aww Huni sounds like you had a right time of it, hope you and Kacie are both feeling better soon.

With my labour I never, ever expected to get to 10cms and pushing with only gas and air as pain relief as I am such a wimp when it comes to any type of pain. Alsi, it never entered my head that I may need forceps and episotomy without any pain relief at all - I was under the impression that you were given an epidural if this was needed, how wrong was I :lol:

I wasn't sure what to expect in terms of recovery, but I think I'm actually doing OK and am managing to do things I didn't expect to which is great.

Since having Aiden I said that although I would go through it all again to have Aiden, there was no way that he would be having a little brother or sister, however now Imuch more open to the idea...

xxx

Huni-I didn't realise it was quite as traumatic as all that. Poor Kacie. Hope you're well.

My labour was completely not as I planned but I think it went well regardless. It was fairly quick and I I'm healing well, so I guess I can't complain too much. Can't imagine letting DH near me for a while though.

Mine was definitely worse than i expected! i'd managed to have quite a positive attitude towards labour beforehand but i really wasn't expecting it to be so long and painful. i was hoping for a water birth and was planning to see how things go and leave to pool to have an epidural if i needed it.
i never made it to the pool as i needed pain relief before i was far enough along to go in!
i'd sort of always thought of an epidural as a safety net - if the pain got too much i'd just have one and it would be fine, but the problem was that because my labour was so long the pain was too much by the time i was 3 cm and so before i was far enough along to have an epidural. however i did have morphine at that stage which was a massive help (i never planned to have morphine either!)

another thing that i really wasn't prepared for was the sleep deprivation. i didn't sleep for more than a 10 min stretch for 3 days which was pretty intense!

the recovery has been pretty slow and i've had lots of small problems over the last 4 weeks, such as an infection in my episiotomy and constipation as a result of taking iron tablets, so i'm still quite sore down there, but actually straight after the birth i recovered surprisingly quickly.

the whole experience has definitely made me anxious about the next one - i think i'll just be terrified of giving birth and having the same experience! though my mum says that i should think that it can't be as bad next time!

i'm sure he doesn't need siblings anyway!

xxx

Ok, here goes.

I've been putting off replying to this, or talking about my birth at all - because it's all a bit raw, but since everyone else has been brave, I think i'll give it a go.

I wasn't happy about the way I was treated before they induced me, (I wasn't sure why I even needed to be induced - no one explained at all, and I also wanted to be induced as naturally as possible, rather than be pumped full of unnecessary hormones) but when I asked questions I was basically told to stop being awkward and do what I was told - or go against medical advice and put my baby at risk. I was so upset by the way they were treating me that I couldn't stop crying (this is before they started inducing me) so they shoved me in a side room - pumped me full of prostin, and then buggered off.

I ended up having a very fast labour (about half an hour), and gave birth in the ante-natal ward, Neil almost had to deliver Emily because they were so short staffed. If anyone had listened to me beforehand - they would have known that my last labour was very short (although not this short!) and I would have been on the delivery suit before they started messing about with me!

But for me, the worst bit - is that I had a massive bleed after the birth, this was so scary - all of a sudden my baby was whisked away from me, and the room was full of people. I was given injections without being told what was happening, and then put on a drip - which basically forced my uterus to contract, and was very painful (waaay worse than labour!) I was struggling to cope with the pain, but no one cared, and I was only given paracetamol. I kept being told that they were short staffed, and that I was taking up 2 midwives that were very busy - which made me feel awful.

After a few hours, I was still bleeding, and they finally managed to find me a bed in the delivery unit - so I was moved down there, and told that the bleed was coming from a second degree tear - which needed to be stitched straight away or "you'll be too weak to even hold your baby in a couple of hours" despite being told earlier that it was just a graze and that it would heal on it's own. At this point I kicked off big style (I think they used the word "hysterical" when they wrote about it in my notes!) it was all too much by that point, and memories from being stitched up last time (after I had Abby) came flooding back (I had a second degree tear - but the local anastethic didn't work, and I felt everything).

I point blank refused to have stitches (or talk about it any more!) until I had had some time to bond with my baby, I also asked why I had to stay on the very strong drip, if the bleed wasn't coming from my uterus - no one was very sure. Anyway, after a while, they examined me again and said that the tear wasn't bleeding very much, and that it might be ok after all (it was - it healed fine) so I am very glad I had my little hissy fit - otherwise I would have been stitched up for no reason.

I think the worst bit of it all, was the moment they told me I would need stitches - just because it sparked such awful memories from last time, so I now feel like I have 2 traumatic births to get over - rather than just one, but at least now I know what I am dealing with, and we can move on.

I have made a complaint about all the things that happened, and the matron in charge of the unit is investigating, she's going to come and see me at home and talk through everything that happened - and then I will make a decision about what to do next. They have also offered me counselling (if I want it) to help me come to terms with it all, but I am going to make a decision about that after I have spoken to the Matron.

Oh gosh that was a bit epic wasn't it? Sorry for posting such a long reply - but it did feel good to get it all down. I'm so glad I've got your girls to talk to, because very few people in the "real world" know the full story of everything that happened.

Hugs.
Nx

It is really interesting reading these so thank you for being so honest and sharing them, especially where some of the memories are difficult.
I am not sure I can answer the question posed by LW as my labour ended up in an emerg csection too. My birth plan went something like water birth preferably, keeping active, will ask for pain relief etc... if I feel I am not coping etc... and that I didn't want intervention (e.g. forceps) or a csection. What actually happened is that I didn't progress past 3cm dilated and Lucas' heart rate kept dipping with my contractions (some of which I could manage, some which were flipping agony!), was monitored for some time before deciding the safest thing for baby L was to carry out the csection.
To my surprise I was calm about this prospect (even though was on my own - Hubs had been sent home to get some sleep while he could thinking I would be hours yet) as I knew it was best for baby. Hubs arrived back to find me in theatre being prepped, poor thing, probably more scary for him than me at that point as they didn't tell him on the phone that that was what was happening, just that things were progressing.
Lucas arrived safe and well and looking back I don't feel cheated out of a natural birth, I feel positive about having had the csection when I was anxious at the prospect during my pg and the care that I received both in delivery/theatre and on the labour ward was fantastic. Everyone was amazing and just thinking about how great the mw's, theatre staff etc... were to me makes me very emotional!
I guess what I am trying to say despite it ending in an emerg csection, I do look back (all of 6 days!) and think of it as a very positive experience and should I be required to have another csection in the future I won't be anywhere near as worried/anxious about it. This is of course down to the expertise and care of the amazing staff, I couldn't have been in better hands.
Recovery wise I think I am doing well, they were happy to discharge me the day after but I did stay until the Monday (Lucas born on the Sat), being at home is great, Hubs and our families are very supportive and although it is only 6 days since major surgery, I feel well.
Phew, that turned into an epic answer! Well done if you managed to read it all
Love MrsH xxxx

My labour went so much better than I could have ever expected pain wise as I was 8cm dilated before I even realised. One thing I will say I didn't like was the fact that the midwife kept saying 'the baby is coming' for the whole four hours I was there. To me when I hear those words I expect the baby to almost be here! I also had to transfer over to the consultant led unit to have my placenta removed surgically which meant I didn't get to hug my baby girl for 6 hours I also had a lovely pregnancy so would quite happily do it all again (although before giving birth I said I wouldn't).

Sorry to read some of the not to nice stories but I'm glad we all have happy little bundles

Bek x

Much much worse for me too! I was induced at 14 days overdue and my little girl arrived on day 16! I had planned a very natural water birth and ended up with every intervention under the sun. Horrible, traumatic experience. I've written my BS but don't want to post it til everyone in DID has had their babies as I don't want to scare anyone as it really wasn't a nice experience At least she's happy and healthy and we're a little family now! x

Wonderful idea LW.... I think it's somehow therapeutic getting things off your chest like this. I'm going to go back and read all the replies in more detail but for now quickly while she's asleep I thought I'd reply.

Huni - truly speechless, I do hope you and Kacie recover fully soon.

My experience was a mixture of better and worse.... I guess the 1st thing is that of course I was meant to have a straight forward c-section. I remember flinching a little when I read the letter confirming the date for my op as Dec 2nd the day before my EDD. I was under the impression c-sections due to breech presentations should have been at 39 weeks. I thought to myself 'what if I go into labour early' but then put that to the back of my mind because of course everyone says that 1st born are always late. So in that respect my labor was far far far worse. There I was fully dilated waiting for a theatre to become free to be able to have an emergency section. I was absolutely petrefied. I wasn't meant to be there and I knew the baby was coming yet I knew I had to wait to have the section.

Having not thought I'd actually ever go into labour as I was having the section the labour itself was actually better than I had thought. I actualy laboured fully in 3 hours so that was pretty shocking and pleasing so that side of it was better. If I ever have another hopefully it'll be just as quick.

No one can ever describe the pain to you can they?? It's without question worse than I thought but I've strangely forgetten the REAl pain.... I guess that's how people have more than 1 child. Not that I'm thinking of that yet

No one can ever describe the pain to you can they?? It's without question worse than I thought but I've strangely forgetten the REAl pain....

I remember after having my 1st thinking it was quite incredible you could survive pain like it. We don't even pass out. Amazing really, but bloody indescribably sore.

I would say mine was worse than i expected but only becase i hadnt prepared myself for the pain.

I was told that i would be in a labour suite from the beginning of induction, from this i assumed i would be having my epidural as soon as allowed at 4cm.

well 1st off they refused me at the labour suite and sent me up to the ward. my contractions started and i was strapped to a monitor, my waters broke an hour and 15 mins later by this time i was 3cm. by the time they got me down to the labour suite i was 7 cm and the mw refused to give me any pain relief other than g&a .... even though during pregnancy the consultant advised an epidural.

by the time a consultant came in and told the mw off for not sorting an epidural, i was then given a spinal and the girls were being delivered so i assume i reached 10cm

7 weeks on i am still in pain and discomfort from the episiotomy which hasnt fully healed and from the fissures i have from constipation after the labour

on the plus side the labour was far quicker than i expected, i was thinking it would take all day to fully dilate and me and hubby would be sitting there twiddling thumbs, my labour was recorded as lasting just under 3.5 hours!

I remember after having my 1st thinking it was quite incredible you could survive pain like it. We don't even pass out. Amazing really, but bloody indescribably sore.

LW - I actually remember screaming at the MW's to help me, cos I couldn't survive it anymore the pain was that horrendous!!!! The ironic thing was I actually was upset at the prospect of not having a natural labour at 1st. I laugh at my stupidity now!!!!

Also just thought I'd add that my experience of the c-section was great. I was up and walking to the toilet on the same day and really had very little pain. I stopped my painkillers a few days after and have had no problems at all since. I'd certainly have 1 again.

Xxx

Hmmmm - better I think

Induced and ended up tearing internally and an episiotomy but had an epidural (magic!!) so didn't feel a thing. Took 2 days to get into labour but once I did the whole thing took 5hrs with just 15 mins of pushing. However, very disappointed at the amount of monitoring needed and the way staff would not let me off monitor at all (kept pretending needed a wee until they fitted a catheter) and felt v pressurised by consultants to 'make more progress'.

However, pushing was wonderful as I didn;t feel much and was so calm and focussed and thrilled to be pushing (I had a previous section so to get that far was brill)/

What I didn't realise was the awful recovery. For the first week I was in tears every day with the pain of the bruising and stitches as well as the awful constipation which felt like my bits were bulging out and about to burst!! That has been awful. Getting used to sleepless nights and days has been hard as well as I hadf forgotten that part!!

All in all though am just so happy I have now experienced a 'natural' birth and I really don't care that I had the epidural even though lots of women seem to want to tell me how they managed without...will good for you but on that bloomin drip and having waters broken I definitely needed it!!!