Hello ladies

I found out today that my little baby passed away at 9wks (should have been 10 weeks today) and have opted to let nature take it's course (previously had 3 D&Cs' and don't want to go for the op this time as have a 10 month old who needs me)

I only lost a little clot yesterday which prompted me going for a scan today, and have had no bleeding since

My questions for anyone who is up to answering them are as follows:-

How long will it take for the actual miscarriage to start?
How much pain can I expect?
How much blood / clots should I expect to pass?
How long should the process take?

I am booked in for a scan again in two weeks to ensure everything has gone and if not, will still have to have the D&C

Not really sure what to expect as gone straight for D&C in past

Hope some of you can help - I know it's an awful topic to have to discuss

Mandy x

hi there

so sorry to hear about your loss. i had a mc on 29th sept. i was about 6-7weeks pregnant. i had some bleeding to start with which lasted a few days then the actual miscariage took place...was extrememly painful and was huge amount of blood (and clots) was in so much pain and couldnt cope so ended up being taken to hospital where they found the actual sack was still in tact so used some forcepts to remove it, they gave me gas and air to cope with the pain which was amazing. i hope this helps, and not everyone get as much pain as i had. remember that if you feel you cant cope, you can go to the hospital for more help.

ashy xxx

Hi Mandy

I am so sorry for all your losses.

Can I also first say how adorable your lo is :\)

I am happy to answer your questions but please remember that having a mc is like asking how long is a piece of string? and often it's a case of 'wait and see' unfortunately. And also, every woman is different and it depends on the circumstances of your mc too, like how far along you were.

I will answer in respect to my first mc because my 2nd one was very early on (not even 5 weeks) but my first one was at 10 1/2 weeks (in July).

I started bleeding at 8 weeks but the bleeding was more like a brown discharge. The actual mc (where I passed the baby) happened about 2 1/2 weeks later. On the monday of that week the blood became heavier and was bright red and on Tuesday I started to pass clots which were quite big. On the wednesday I passed the actual baby, which was the most distressing thing ever but I was pleased that I had got to see my baby too. The bleeding then turned more like a heavy period. My bleeding did not stop for another 5 or so weeks but it was a lot lighter during this time and eventually turned back to the brown discharge. I then had another small bleed about a week later for a few days. However, the EPU said this was very unusal for the bleeding to last so long - normally I think they say about 2 weeks (they told me to ring back if I was still bleeding after 2 weeks). The reason mine went on so long was because I retained some of the pregnancy in my uterus and so my body kept trying to get it out. In the end it came out with my first period after the mc.

They told me the first time I went in that it could take up to 6 weeks for the mc to actually happen but it's usually a lot shorter. The thought of waiting 6 weeks was really daunting to me, but like you I wanted to let it happen naturally. My body was really slow with realising what was happening they said (my HCG levels took unusually long to go down) and most women take a lot shorter time to miscarry.

The pain varies from woman to woman. I found I had little cramps on and off but the worst pain was the week of the actual mc and it was like bad period pain but I found that painkillers and a hot water bottle did help so that I could get some sleep. I also found my pain and bleeding was worse in the evening and night, but again every woman is different.

Your first period should come within 4 - 6 weeks and will most likely be quite heavy.

If you have any other questions please feel free to ask. I hope nothing I've said has made you worry - I wanted to share what it was like for me so that if any of the above happens for you you might be more reassured that it's ok....but like I said before everyone is different and it is not usual for it to take so long.

Take care, NN xx

Hey my lovely sorry if tmi,
when I had my first mc 3yrs ago it started around 4 weeks after baby had died and I bled for 2 weeks after.
I started of having cramps which were like contractions an they got stronger and stronger until I passed massive clots (fist size). First came the placenta, then the sack with baby about half hour later and last the cord (which I still can't get the sight of that out my mind, you could see everything!).
I was unlucky as it was the first time my mum had left me on my own for 2 weeks and I must admit it was bad as I literally gushed all over the floor at one point.
I was literally flooding the night time sanitary towels, which its typical is why my mum left me. It was worse being on my own as all I felt was really scared.
Everything came out within a day then I stopped bleeding 10 days or so and everthing was complete.
Thinking of you.xxxx

Thank you ladies for your honest responses

Last night broke down uncontrollably as soon as I had put my little man to bed (had tried really hard not to get upset during the day as didnt want him to pick up on anything)

I am so sorry to hear of the dreadful experiences you have all been through (and to be honest a little scared now of what to expect) however the detail you have given is very helpful and I can use this as reference when I do start losing (still nothing again today so apart from the small clot I had two days ago no bleeding at all) Hope everything does start to come away soon as if when I go back to hospital in two weeks, if it hasnt all cleared they have said I will have to have a D&C and I really don't want that

May need to post again when the inevitable begins as your support will prove invaluable

Take care all

Mandy x

I had a totally different experience to the others so please dont be scared. I started spotting on the Wednesday and by the Friday i was bleeding red blood i wasnt worried at all as i was in no pain whatsoever - i went to the hospital on the Saturday and they said it was a threatened miscarriage and to come back if i was in any pain (stay in bed for a week in the mean time) i went home and stayed in bed till the monday when about the lunchtime i had a period type pain and as i stood up it felt like my insides had fallen out (sounds worse than it is but i dont know how to explain it any better) i went straight to the bathroom and i was bleeding quite heavily and had a medium sized clot, i called my husband who came straight home and took me to the hospital i was in no physical pain just emotionally heart broken. When i got to the hospital the nurse said that it was a good sign that i wasnt in any pain and she had seen more blood on women that had gone on to have healthy babies but i just knew that i wasnt going to be one of them. I had to go to the toilet again and this is when i lost everything else. I didnt see any of it (i didnt want to) i went down to the EPU and the doctor gave me an internal scan to confirm that my body had expelled everything which it had. I then went home and rested. My doctor signed me off work for 2 weeks and i didnt do anything in those 2 weeks. I had no real physical pain just emotional but i must say that time is a great healer. I will never forget what happened but it no longer makes me upset every day.

Take care of yourself i take it you have someone (husband boyfriend) around that can give you lots of hugs xxx