Hi I have just found out when me and hubby went for 7 week scan at IVF clinic that i have had a missed miscarriage have to go back on thursday as they asked me to wait a week just so they are 100% but i don't no what happens now obviously i am not bleeding yet and was told that the baby had gone around 5/6 weeks how long does it take to bleed i am lost as what to do x

Hi again hunnie, I have just posted a reply over in due in March, but have just seen this post so though I would tell you my experience, it may help.
I went for a scan at 10 wks and was told there was no heartbeat and that the baby had died at 8 wks. The hospital had told me that hopefully things would pass naturally and to go back in a couple of weeks for another scan if things hadn't passed. A week later I started to bleed very heavily and did eventually end up back in hospital as I was losing too much blood. But while I was there things did pass naturally. I wont say it was easy, it wasn't, it was painful and extremely upsetting and worrying, but that all aside at least the feelings of being in limbo were over and I felt ready then to deal with my loss and to eventaully move on. For me the hardest part was knowing that my body for some unknown reason had held onto my dead baby and if it did die at 8 wks why did my body hold onto till 11 wks. That I will never know but, in all honesty there was a feeling of relief that it was finally over.
I think to try and answer you question all our bodies are differnt and like every pregnancy is differnt so is every mc, but to just hear you are not alone, and others have been where you are was a big comfort and it is good to hear other peoples experiences both good and bad to ease some of your worries.
I really hope this has helped in some small way, and just keeping talking hun, I am a big believer in a problem shared is a problem halved.

Thinking of you.

Leigh-Anne xx

mrssmith-so sorry you're having to go through this. Your story is pretty similar to mine.
You may remember that we had IVF in May and got a BFP. However, at the 7 wk scan, we were told that it wasn't looking as far on as I should be and to expect the worst. As is protocol, we also had to go back the following wk for a further scan which showed a very weak/slow heartbeat and a small for dates baby.
I had had no bleeding or pain. They gave us three options:

ERPC-evacuation of the uterus under general anaesthetic
Medical management-tablets followed by pessaries 48hrs later in hospital to induce the m/c
Conservative management-wait and see approach with me coming in wkly for r/v and scans

I opted for the wait and see approach as I'd had a natural m/c before, and I wanted to avoid a procedure and also wanted to be at home when it happened. The first bad news scan was at 7 weeks, I spotted for 10 days at 9.5 weeks, and finally miscarried at just over 11 wks. I think that's as long as they would have left nature to take it's course, as I'd been booked in for medical management the following weekend if things hadn't progressed.
It's really up to you. Some people opt for ERPC so that it's over quicker. The medical management means you will have to stay in hospital for ~8hrs after the pessaries but they can give you strong pain-killers to help with the cramps. If you wait for it to happen naturally, it can drag things out, but I knew it was the best option for me. It was sore, and I had very heavy bleeding but the worst of it only lasted ~48hrs. I then bled like a period for another couple of weeks or so.
I have since started up my CB fertility Monitor again, and got a peak 15/16 days after the m/c started, so hopefully things are getting back on track.

I wish you all the best, and whatever you decide to do will be the best way for you. It is an awful thing to go through, made even worse after having to go though IVF/ICSI. If you have any questions, let me know.

xxx

Thank you girls for your replies it really does help as i have never been pregnant before so have no idea what to expect on a miscarriage in some ways i wish my body would just get on with it but then it all makes it all so final i just don't no what to feel or say am so gutted never been so heart broken in my life x

Mrssmith,
I too had never been pregnant before when I had my mc, so like you it was all a totally new experience. My husband and I had been trying for 6 years to get pg with no success and just assumed that it wasn't meant to be for us. But then I fell pregnant by complete surprise and we were overjoyed particularly as I am 38. But like you for us in ended in the worst possible way with mc in April this year.
I too felt completely useless and helpless with all the why me, and why now, it's just so unfair and so on. I thought that these feelings would take a long time to leave me but as they say time is a good healer and with the help of some lovely ladies on here we got through the bad days and fortunately for us have fallen pg again.
I am not saying the days you have ahead of you will be easy, some will be good and some not so good, your hormones will be all over the place and you will be emotional, but as things hormonoly(sp) get back to normal so will you.
But never give up hope, there is always hope and lots of PMA never goes a miss either. Just keeping talking about your feelings to whoever will listen, they may not always understand and they may well say things you find hurtful, but really their intentions are good and they are saying things because they care for you and want to help.
I personally found comments like, well you fell pregnant this time so you know you can do it again, very difficult. But I somehow managed to bite my tongue and think to myself that yes that is a possibility and they dont really know how long we had been trying and they were really just trying to boost my spirit and encourage me.
Sorry for ramble but just want you to know you are not alone.
Feel free to email me if you want to chat.

Hugs

Leigh-Anne xx

Hi mrssmith69 - I have had a double mc confirmed today, to cut a hideous story short, found out last weds of July that was pregnant after being diagnosed with polycystic ovaries and being told conceiving naturally was going to be more difficuly, last weekend was told my pregnancy was failing, only to find out on the monday that there was still a heartbeat, and a sack where a second one was. Today we found out the second one had died - have spent the week waiting for today to check all was ok with the second. So i can completely sympathise with how you are feeling. I have started bleeding quite a bit, and i am hoping it will continue rather than having to go for the d&c they gave me as an option... The hospital did say they normally would wait for a week or two for something to happen naturally, but if not to contact them as there is the high risk of infection. Although surgery is probably not high on your wish list, if it eliminates you being poorly, you will have to do it. I guess once you have it out, you can start to move on.

And La-La, all people keep saying to me is 'at least you know you can get pregnant' - and much like you, I am gritting my teeth a bit because i feel its all a bit unfair really. I know they mean well, but I just want to have my babies back.

mrssmith69 - sending you hugs for your heartbreak and sadness xxx

I am so sorry for you this is all so hard who ever said it would be easy to have a baby lied x

How are you doing mrssmith? Just letting you know we're thinking of you and here if you need us. I know how low you'll be feeling but hope you and OH are supporting each other through this sad time.

xxx

Thank you we are doing a lot better have finally started spotting which i am glad about as it feels a bit like getting some closure, it seems weird i have been in LTTC for so long then over to due in march now i don't no where i belong