Back with more bad news

13 messages
arg Platinum member
24/09/2010 at 16:31
I need some support and know that this is the forum to get it from

I haven't been on here since March when I had my 3rd mc and was hoping to be back with good news - we weren't going to start trying again until we got back from a busy touring holiday in the States at the end of August but 2 days after we got back I unexpectedly found that I was pregnant - we were thrilled!

But for the last few hours I have had bleeding and period pains and am pretty sure that I am losing this little one at 7 weeks.

Am I just being greedy wanting another baby when I already have 3 healthy wonderful children?
I just can't stop wanting a 4th child and also don't want my last pregnancy to be a mc as I will always wonder about the baby if it had survived.

We are fortunate to get pregnant easily (well up until now but I will be 40 in 2 weeks) but I just want to have one more successful pregnancy.

I feel really miserable at the moment knowing that we will have to start from the beginning again,
25/09/2010 at 04:54
Oh hunni i don't know what to say as i have no idea what you must be feeling but i just want you to know we're here to listen. You were so helpful to me when i was expecting my 3rd and trying to decide which birthpool to order etc and i've been wondering how you are as i hadn't seen any posts from you in a while. I'm so sad that its been such an awful year for you and hope that what you're going through now doesn't spell the worst. I hope that whetever the outcome you have support and help around you and have everything crossed for you that things go your way and baby no4 is in your arms soon. A womans desire to have children doesn't really follow much logic in my opinion and yearning for a baby when you have three perfect children certainly doesn't reflect greed in any way.
Much Love to you and your family
Jo xxxxxxxxxxxx
25/09/2010 at 04:57
awwwwwwww sweetie, ok so I assume you have been in contact with your midwife/doctor/scan unit to check whats going on, maybe an early scan? I hope they have helped you. xxI really hope your little bean makes it. fingers crossed x

I do have a very close friend who has lost 6 babys in a row, she really wanted to keep trying so a month or two after each miscarriage they tried again and the same thing happened. Her consultant ( at portland private hospital) told her to stop trying completely for 6 months so that her hormone level gets back to normal etc and guess what.. 7 months later she fell pregnant and she went on to have huge bouncing twin boys( one 7lb, the other 7lb 4oz!!!!)
Just wanted to share that as there is hope, L is also 40 and had a very healthy twin pregnancy after all the heartache and emotional times.

No I dont think you are being greedy, some of us are just made to be maternal and want a large family, I am so very blessed with my four and wouldnt change it for the world( unless we won the lotto the hubby would get the vasectomy reversed lol!!)
Seriously tho hunnie, I wish you all the best in the weeks ahead, I really cant imagine what you are feeling but wish you all the best, hugs and kisses babe xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
25/09/2010 at 16:41
oh arg i'm so sorry to here this. I know how much you want a 4th baby.
take care.
xx

Mommy to 5 wonderful waterbabies, 3 born at home, all breastfed and 2 worn
I believe everyone should be supported in whatever they choose to do!
http://safehands-doula.webs.com/

arg Platinum member
26/09/2010 at 18:02
Thanks for your replies. I went to A&E yesterday as I am on steroids (to prevent mc!!!) and wass told that if I did mc they would send the fetus for testing. My HCG levels were too low for my dates and I passed the fetus today so that is another pregnancy over.

Babs 4, thanks for telling me about your friend, I am nowhere near ready to give up yet and am still hopeful that I will have another baby at some time.

JoJoMummy thanks, I remember you too and look forward to hearing about your next home water birth .

Michelle07 Congratulations on the birth of your daughter (and especially the wonderful home water birth) and what a lovely name xx
27/09/2010 at 01:27
Oh hun, huge huge hugs. No mummy should ever have to part with their baby. You are so strong, and you are absolutely not being greedy. Don't give up hope if you feel there is someone missing from your family, then I believe it's only a matter of time before you are holding them in your arms. I really hope the doctors are quick and helpful. Wish I could say anything useful but for what it's worth I really wish you didn't have to go through this, you are a wonderfully mum who absolutely deserves a new addition. Keep us updated, and if there is anything we can do to help just ask.

xx
27/09/2010 at 05:08
oh hun, i am so, so sorry. Sending you ((((big hugs)))) xxxx
27/09/2010 at 10:54
Oh hunnie, I'm so very sorry to be reading this.
I hope you won't give up and you fall pregnant with your number 4 soon. Thinking of you and huge hugs x x x
28/09/2010 at 01:01
I am so sorry arg. I know how much you want another child and NO you are NOT selfish for wanting that. I hope they get some answers for you and that you go on the have a healthy pregnance some time soon
d x
arg Platinum member
01/10/2010 at 15:56
Thanks for all your kind words.

Well we went to see our consultant today who was going to do our 8 week scan. He was very kind - but thinks that my body is fighting the babies and just as your immune system gets more effective in fighting infection, my body will get better at fighting the babies which isn't wonderful news. However, I am having a special blood test next week which might show if this is happening then he might be able to give me something to fight it.
We also had chronnsome tests which isn't as likely to be the problem as we already have 3 healthy children.
It definately helped to see him and will be interesting to see if the results show anything.
However, I wish it had been my 8 week scan instead xx
02/10/2010 at 11:49
awww sweetie, I am glad you might get some answers but I do feel for you.

good luck in the next few months, hope it all works out for you hunnie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
03/10/2010 at 08:30
HI arg

Im so sad to hear that you lost this baby too, have just had another m/c as well and so I know how crap it is. The last one was at 5w4d so very early but I was ready to throw in the towel - I have 5 wonderful children why should i want another when they are already my world - but then you wrote soething on my post in TTCAMC and I talked it all through with OH and we have deided that we too dont want to have our last pregnancy be an unsuccessful one so will be unoficially trying

What I guess Im trying to say hunni is that you have given me some positive advice which has made me feel so mych better so you deserve the same break and I for one will be keeping my fingers and toes crossed for you xxxxx

Take care x
arg Platinum member
06/10/2010 at 14:46
Thanks mummy mog - although we want to try again straight away we are trying to be sensible and wait for our blood results so we will start trying again next month.
I'm so glad you talked to your OH and that you are going to try again.Hopefully we will both soon have good news.
Keep in touch xx
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