Gina Ford advocates getting babies fully awake at 10pm with a view to them sleeping soundly until 7.

What does the science say?

My 14-week old says it's not for him, thank you very much, and has expressed a preference for waking at 530 a.m. and being grumpy all day as he struggles to sleep for more than 30 mins at a stretch.

I know it's emotive, so please try to provide web links showing scientific analysis, or your own summaries of specific analysis.

I am considering giving mum the following choices (which might send her to the funny farm, because she wants him fully awake as per Ford):

(1) Feed him after midnight an amount of mum's choosing, or whenever he wakes before midnight, and keep him up an hour if he seems up to it. I believe he would be more able to stay up at that time without it being so awful;

(2) Dream feed/don't aggressively wake him;

(3) Wake at 10pm for 1hr 15 minutes if mum can show me ANY scientific analysis that backs up Gina Ford's assertion that doing this isn't damaging. (Ford's lack of qualifications have always profoundly worried me although she seems to wear it as a badge of honour.)

Alza

I just did it. These were the choices I gave:

*You do it;
*We feed him after midnight, by which time hopefully he'll be more able to have some awake time;
*We find some research that proves waking a baby at 10pm who seriously doesn't want to be woken, is not damaging;
*I don't aggressively wake him.

She said the only option is that she does it. She is on pills for post-natal anxiety and sees this as a deep betrayal by me and a severe lack of unity on my part.

I said `we are in conflict. deal.' I am DESPERATE to find some research that allows me to wake him and not feel this deep guilt and self-loathing I feel.

Can anybody help? If you are one of the people who viewed this post, can you think of anybody who's been through this?

I think that you need to try and find something that suits you all.

Firstly I am no expert, my baby is 8 weeks old and is calm and happy (i think this is down to luck). I had a relatively straight forward birth, have recovered well and have been ok emotionally, but by the end of the day I am exhausted and I find it very easy to moan at my partner and get fustrated as I sometimes feel he not giving me his full support. I should imagine your partner is tired and is trying to get as long a sleep as possible.

Secondly there are lots of people on here who hate Gina Ford and her routines, I have read the books and must say before my little one was born was determined to follow them to the letter. I have no scientific evidence but think that a lot of what she says makes sense. I also read Jo Tantums sleep guide and the baby whisper and have found myself taking a bit of all of them. All of the routines suggest a dream feed at 10-11, although the later state that you are feeding them in their sleep. Also I can't remember it saying you had to wake baby up, i think GF recommends treating hours between 7pm-7am as night time, quiet, lights low etc... the idea is they sleep from 7-10pm so that are refreshed to take a good feed. Our little one is always sleepy and doesn't take alot unless we tickle her feet, which stirs her.

With the sleeping during the dayit could be that you are not acting quick enough when your baby gets tired, in the last week or so we have tried settling our little one soon as she shows signs of being tired. We have found that she has fewer longer sleeps as a result. Before she was very grumpy and wolud doze sometimes for just a few minutes.

Prehaps you could try and see if there is another pattern that would suit you. Me and baby have had a few early nights in the last week. Me putting her down at 9pm ish and to my suprise she has sleep through unit 5am, she then feeds and goes back down until 8am. I am early bird so this suits me but may not be for everyone.

Hope this helps.