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dont know who else to talk too!!!im so fed up...

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Joined : Jun 25, 2008
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Posted : Nov 14, 2008 11:34:55 AM
Subject : dont know who else to talk too!!!im so fed up...

hi

i just need to scream lol,well tell you girls how fed up i am.
i live in a 2bedroom flat with my 5 kids,girl 14, boy 12, boy 10, girl 9, boy 2, plus 32+5 with twins..
my local landlord and council are just really driving me mad,i was hoping to move within next 4 weeks but they are saying im not overcrowded???????????????

i just want to cry im so fed up,no garden for kids to play in.

i have 2 bedrooms in room 1 i have put my 12+10 year old sons,in bedrom 2 i have my 14+9 year old girls, in lounge on sofa is me and on a mattress on floor is my 2year old boy!!!
where do i put twins??my son needs a bedroom but the 2 rooms have so space,does any1 have any knowledge on housing??

sorry to go on xxx

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faeriestar

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Posted : Nov 14, 2008 1:08:49 PM

hi hun im sorry you and your family are being put through this. couldnt some one from the council come and look at your home so that they can see that you really do need a bigger place. coz when you talk on the phone all they think is
* children under the age of 7 years can share a room
* over the age of 7 years children can only share a room if they are of the same sex ( boys cant share a room with girls)
* a child is not classed as a person needing a room until the child is a year old.

im sorry im not any help really. maybe you could take photos/ video your home so they can see you needed a bigger home. keep phoning them and pester them until you and your family get the kind of home you need. again im sorry im not much help. x.

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MrsS1258
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Posted : Nov 14, 2008 1:13:52 PM

If overcrowding was an issue before you fell pregnant then why have more children?

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mms
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Posted : Nov 14, 2008 3:15:44 PM

excuse me MrsS1258???

4 ur info i only had 3 kids here until 1st august then my ex-husband fell ill with M.S and social services had to remove them suddendly and bring them to me,so mayb you should see all facts 1st!!!

i didnt plan my babies,i was on pill and fell pregnant with tem,i lost my partner over this,so not planned but im blessed they are mine now.

i came on here for advise and support not to b put down,thanks MrsS1258 you have been such a great help!!!!!!!!!!!!!wish i hadnt bothered now.

mandy

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halle
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Posted : Nov 14, 2008 3:43:44 PM

Thats a bit harsh Mrs S this is the support forum not the have a go forum!

Sorry your having a hard time mms chin up I'm sure something will turn up keep your chin up I'm 33+2 with just baby so I dread to think how you are feeling with twins!!

Good luck and hope things get better soon xxxx

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MrsS1258
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Posted : Nov 14, 2008 4:52:48 PM

Well in that case, if social services placed them with you then they should have offered you a bigger place there and then - I am sorry.

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mms
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Posted : Nov 14, 2008 5:00:09 PM

housing is nothing to do with social services,their was no way my sons going into care,that was my 2 options.

so i have to go through the transfer list,which i couldnt do until i was getting child benefit which takes weeks to sort out,as my ex's family wouldnt let him sign over to me!!!long story.

mandy 32+5 twins x

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louise1000469

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Posted : Nov 15, 2008 2:49:33 PM

That sounds like a nightmare situation.
The only thing i could suggest is to go to the council with all the children (straight from school so you don't get judged for taking them out) and say, ok I have 5 kids and 2 on the way, I need at least one more bedroom and ideally a garden. Perhaps if they see the problem they might be more sympathetic?
Good luck

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GoingCrazy
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Posted : Nov 15, 2008 3:13:21 PM

Sorry i have no experience but what is your ex-husbands' housing/financial situation? I understand he may not be able to look after the children physically anymore but he should still be contributing financially, or if he is in a more preferrable living situation than you are (if he owns his own home?) then maybe he should be providing more support that way. Saying that,i have no idea of his situation so that may not even be possible. If the council lwill not give you a bigger place than i guess (if it is physically possible space wise) you'll have to put your 2 year old in with his brothers and have the twins in the living room with you (maybe look at bunk beds to increase floor space if you havent got them already).Unless you can rent privately then i suppose theres not much else you can do, sorry cant be of much help, hope things get sorted for you soon xxx

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maille
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Posted : Nov 15, 2008 8:53:09 PM

Sorry to hear about you problems, i really feel for you i also live in a 2 bed flat with two girls, 3 step children that come and stay and that is hard enough and one on the way. i take my hat off to you. xx Which council are you with ????

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faeriestar

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Posted : Nov 16, 2008 3:28:31 PM

hi hun, just wondered how you and your family are. and if you are any closer to getting your housing problem sorted.

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hedgie
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Posted : Nov 16, 2008 6:18:25 PM

Oh Mandy,

I hope today is looking sunnier, I can't imagine how small a 2 bedroom must feel with well near enough 7 los, I have three in a two bed at the minute and it feels like a zoo! I am so sorry the council are dragging their feet, especially as it would seem that at least for the next couple months it going to be damn hard to just up and move, I mean with the immenant birth of you twins. Do you have anyone who can help? Are you anywhere near the Surrey area, I'd happily come give you a hand Happy. Is it possible/ worth it to ask if there is anything in a council in the surrounding councils to yours? Maybe a different council might be able to move you more quickly, could you look for a larger house share, maybe four bed but have a lodger? I bet it just feels like too big a job so heavily pregnant with lots of people depending on you... sorry if my suggestions are less than helpful.


(((hugs)))

xx

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siany
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Posted : Nov 16, 2008 8:28:03 PM

hi, i'm not entirely sure on how the whole housing system works but my sister recently had a problem with over crowding (and she only has 3) and her local council didn't have anywhere to move them to, so instead she found somewhere privately and claims housing benefits, is this maybe an option for u?

hope u manage to find a solution soon

xx


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mms
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Posted : Nov 17, 2008 12:05:55 AM

hi
thanks everyone..sorry my pc broke,now sorted...

i had a really down few days feel abit better now,ive been moved to priority but they say im not stat overcrowded as i have emough floor space.they used hall and kitchen in this..

said i can put 2 babies in moses baskets to slep i can fit a single bed in hall/?what the hell are they on??

anyway have meeting this week on wednesday so we will see?

ex is in council accomadation,3 bedroom bungalow...im with chelmsford borough council,they say i need 4 bed house,i agree but could b 2-3 years??

mandy x

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GoingCrazy
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Posted : Nov 17, 2008 2:23:07 PM

Im sure one of the girls who works in housing has said on here before that they cannot count the kitchen as a room for sleeping?

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lynz_81
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Posted : Nov 17, 2008 5:11:14 PM

This sounds like a nightmare situation! Is there no way you can rent privately and claim housing benefit? This is what my friend has done, as she was in a 2 bed flat with number 2 on the way, and then she was given guardianship of her 15 year old sister! It was crowded enough in her flat, i cant even imagine what it must be like in yours! If all else fails, make an official complaint to your council and write to your MP, but iwould suggest looking at renting privately first, as long as you're not asking for housing benefit for a 9 bed mansion they should help you out. Hope it gets sorted soon, and good luck with the new babies!

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JunieMummy

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Posted : Nov 17, 2008 5:15:09 PM

hi mms - are you on benifits? If so could you rent privately on a place that accepts HB you would be entitled to full HB in which case your rent would be pretty low. Its worth finding out about. Also ur local CAB are very good with helping sort out housing needs. Good luck babe - take care xx

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Lin+Lexie+Leah

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Posted : Nov 25, 2008 9:29:18 PM

Hi i was just wondering how you were getting on?how did the meeting go?i hope they find you somewhere soon how is the pregnancy going?
take care
Lin24weeks

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mms
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Posted : Nov 25, 2008 11:23:34 PM

hi
still getting no-where,i cannot privatly rent as local council wont help with deposits etc as i have a secure tenancy?
twins are counted until 1 years old.we r having loads of meetings etc,but as they say they dont have any houses,my size empty or ready anytime soon.
just have to wait and see.
mandy 34+2 twins

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rubysmum1
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Posted : Nov 28, 2008 2:30:39 PM

Hi hun i really feel for you, i am overcrowded too but your situation is far worse then mine. we have 4 and 1 on the way and we are in a 3 bed and that is a squeeze so god knows how you are managing. We are down for a 4/5 bed but dont have a hope in hell in getting one as our council said we could be waiting for as long as 12 years!!!!!!! Are there any medical needs or anything like that you can tell your council so that maybe they can help you faster?? i hope something comes up quick for you take care xxx

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camlo

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Posted : Nov 28, 2008 4:04:05 PM

I know when I used to be a health visitor I used to write letters of support for Mums to give to housing saying their situation was causing stress and that it could contribute to ill health within the family... could you ask your HV to do the same?
Otherwise put an advert offering to swap with someone looking to downsize?-long shot I know!

Whatever your housing situation- hope you are well and think you are so brave going it alone with 5 +2 babies !!
Good Luck xxxxxxxxxxxxx

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