did anyones pnd hit them the same day their baby was born?
ethan (5mths) was born at 7pm and by the middle of that night i had a major panic attack that felt like it didnt entirely stop for 2 days til i got out of hospital. i have suffered anxiety/pa's in the past but have never experienced anything like this in my life. i was terified id get to the stage where i had to jump out the window to get out..i was also unable to tell anyone how i was feeling for fear that they would think i wasnt a good mum, didnt want the baby or whatever...so i suffered in silence for 2 whole days. i felt relieved when hubbie was there to visit, casue then i felt ethan was safe, casue he didnt just have me to care for him, i felt how could i possibly care for him when im in this mess, and couldnt stop crying thinking im all he has in this hospital and im a mess.
i just kept thinking how the wee thing only has me, and how i am so not good enough.
hes my second and never had anything like this with my first.
the panic attacks and anxiety havent stopped, but i have had both pnd questionnaires and they say its not bad enough score that ive got it, altho i did lie on the first one, then told the truth on the second one and they said my score was getting worse (higher).
i do love ethanand have never felt like i dont want him or that hes ruined my life or anything like that, i just have extreme anxiety in general and esp a few days before period, and first few days after it comes i feel terrible, like i cant be like this anymore and cant cope.
i feel like im getting worse and have gp appt on thurs. im scared to say how i really feel. i think theylly think im silly for waiting 5 mths to say anything.
please help, i cant stoip crying worrying about why im like this x