I was christianed as a baby and supposedly a christian, however I have never followed any type of religion ever since and havnt planned too. My oh is catholic and spent alot of time when he was young attending church and was an alter boy and did ' confermations' (sorry if spelt wrong) anyway once a teen he tells me he left it all behind and hasnt been to church since. But since having LO he really wants him christened.... I dont know if I agree, would we be allowed if we arnt church goer's, would it be a bit hypocritical? On that matter, oh has suggested we attend church again on a regular basis for LO..................... I am sorry to say this but I really dont want too, its so not me and would feel fake for me to go! Do you think it would be mean to kick up a fuss, or do you think LO should go to church and be introduced to a religion? Im really lost on this one!!!! Help!!!!!!! ( sorry if ive offended anyone, none meant!)

you could do what we did and have a thanksgiving - its still happens in the church but there are no strong religous promises you have to make.

i dont follow religion, but hubby was once a catholic.... neither of us go to church these days and wouldnt have felt right having a full blown christening.
our vicar that did the thanksgiving actually said he was happier to do that for us and us be honest with him about it, than for us to go to church and not want to be there just to have Ollie christened....

With regards to religion, were letting Ollie decide when he's older if he want to become a believer in it. I certainly dont believe after all the things that have happened in my family, and OH doesnt really care about religion (says theres better things to worry about - sorry if that offends church goers but there is for us) so we wont be taking Ollie.

I dont believe he'll be any the worse off for not going, and he can make his own mind up when he knows more and is older.

If you have to compromise with OH could he not take LO to church himself without you? And you talk about wether to have the full christening or a thanksgiving ceremoney - as you wouldnt be comfortable with the religious promises?
xxx

I'm the same as you about religion, it's not for me and I would feel really hypocritical to go to church. Personally I would not have lo christened as you have to promise to bring them up as a Christian- and that could be difficult if you don't believe yourself.

I woud do what S.Y. suggests, look at the possibility of a thanksgiving type service and then let your oh take lo to church if he wants to. That way you are teaching him about christianity but not forcing him, and he can decide for himself when he is old enough.

I'm the same as you as well, personally I don't believe in god and I think it would be very hypocritical of me to 'borrow' the church for things like weddings or christenings. Fortunately oh feels the same as me so although a few family members (mainly mil and my gran) were disapointed we got married in a civil ceremony and neither of mine will be christened. When they are big enough I will try and explain all the things that other people/religons believe and let them make up their own minds.
xx

Maybe I will discuss with oh tonight............. Dont really think I want to have a ceremony when I do not believe. and as you said about the LO making up their own mind when they're BO!
What is the thanksgiving ceremony? is it like a naming one?

I am the same as Bedhead - we dont believe so wont be getting Tommy christened. My eldest two werent christianed either - I think there is enough information available so if they ever decide to look into a religion then we will discuss it when they are able to chose for themselves!

Anyway I think I might be barred from our local church now - having made a complete prat of myself at a christening we went to there at the weekend! And I was worried about Ollie doing something stupid!

Basically it was for us - just a way of saying thank you to the family and friends for helping us bring up Ollie, and to say thank you (to who i dont know - didnt say god) for Ollie being here.
We still had godparents (special friends i think they were called), and i think there was one prayer in there, but that was about it.

So i guess its about the same as a narming ceremony - and this sounds really horrible but the church said they prefered us to have it there instead of an official naming ceremony - because it was cheaper - free at the church - and it meant people would go to the church and possibly make a donation.... i think the registrars fees for a naming ceremony here were about £150

xxx

Hi hun, its a really tough call when you and OH have a different opinion about something so major. I totally understand it will feel fake for you and that from the other side you don't want to make it look like your say is the only one that counts. My OH never been christined , I was but I never meant anything for me as I generally dont belive in God.

So it never been a problem between me and him but I got lot of pressure from my family. I always explain it this way : When Sophie is old enough to understand about religion or start asking about it thats fine. We will tell her about every religion, after all who's to judgde which is the most important or 'real' one. If she has that sort of feeling in her heart and want to join any type of church, shes free to do it, wont bother me if its Catholic, Muslim or any other. Maybe try to reasure your OH you're not against it, just want your child to have a choice, and be mature enough to understand spiritually what it means. xxx

Me and oh don't attend church but my oh did when he was younger. We both have been christened and his family attend church every week. We had our lo christened at the weekend. All our church asked is try and come to family service one a month. We went for her to be blessed and it was a lovely service. the vicar is very modern and realises people can't attend every week. We are planning to try and take our lo every month. I know it won't happen every month but we are going to try.

maybe you could consider a naming ceremony, it is a difficult one but if you are not a church goer and you do not have strong beliefs then would you feel right having your lo christened? One of the questions they ask is do you turn to Christ which you have to answer I turn to Christ, and like you say you would feel wrong to say it if you didnt mean it. I am not trying to preach to you or put you off, I had my oldest 2 christened and I didnt attend a church or have any particular beliefs, I did it becuase it was the thing to do even though it didnt feel right, My youngest 2 had naming ceremonies, we made our own promises to our children which were basically that we would always love and support them etc and we read them a poem which we picked especially for them, interestingly we do attend church regularly now and I do have very firm beliefs but I wouldn't have the younger 2 christened as I think it is something they can decide for themselves when they are old enough to make an informed choice. xx

hi i am a christian..

i was baptised about 3 years ago, altho my parents got me christened when i was a baby thinking that was the right thing to do i guess.

it is my understanding that being christened as a baby does not result in salvation. altho i do understand why parents do it, and until i was a christian i would have done the same with my children.

i have added a link below for a christian site which explains why it is done, and really why believers baptism, as it is called (by immersion in water, not on babies head), is showing obedience to christ (ie. as an older child or adult who has made the choice themselves).

so in other words if the child is not a christian (ie. because they are not old enough to make the decision for themselves) then it is not really biblical... what i mean is that it doesnt ever say in the bible that water should be put on a babies head, but it does say how jesus and others got baptised (by immersion in water) and that we should do the same once we have made a choice to live by him.

so what i am trying to say is, that if you are to have a ceremony for your baby (i'd have whats called a 'dedication') but that still doesnt give salvation to the child, they would still have to make a decision for christ themselves once old enough.

anyway, pls read the link cause that explains it better.

lecture over (LOL) and hope i havent offended anyone i am only saying what it says in bible, which is what i believe... X

here is the link

http://www.gotquestions.org/infant-baptism.html