And my oh as usual tells me I'm being stupid!

Had a rubbish day - Gabe is an angel most of the time but seems to sense when we are waiting for something...at 1.30 I went to baby group, 2.15 I had his appointment for 6 week check even tho he is 8 wks tomoro, so I went to that only to be kept waiting for an hour!! He was screaming & I mean screaming...with loads of other mums and their quiet babies there. I was so embarrassed. And when I got in there, the doctor started unwrapping a syringe! I said ERM its his check up not his jabs!!! So he had his check which took all of 2 minutes, they didnt even weigh him so I went to the clinic to get him weighed...again...kept waiting 30 mins and he was screaming again even tho he'd been fine when he was getting checked over.

And then this afternoon he has been ok but (I know this is going to sound so silly) had a bogey right at the end of his nose which was annoying him so oh said hold his head still while I get it out ( was just a tad far for a tissue to get) and bit off the end of a cotton bud & eased it out! He didnt touch Gabes nose once but he was really unsettled after being disturbed by having head held still.

I dunno....I just feel so shit today. I keep thinking I might have PND but the majority of the time i'm feeling fine. I just worry about everything like I never did before. I feel like I'm a bad mum and I hate it when he cries, it goes through me and I just feel so bad for him and want to cry myself. Everything i do, I feel like I have to "OK" it with someone just to make sure it is the right thing. Like I said most of the time I'm fine but once a week/fortnight I have a REALLY bad day.

Aaahhh babe!

You are completely normal (I hope) coz even tho Tommy is my 3rd, I seem to have the odd day where I am completely neurotic and convinced I am doing everything wrong and hes only just over 3 wks!

Am sure the HV said that at about 8 - 12 wks they do a score chart thing to test you to see if you do have PND so why not ask about that next time you go?

To be honest reading your thread has made me feel better and realise I am not the only one, my lo (14weeks) is my first and same as you am ok most of the times, but some days I worry about everything, feel teary and have cried about being a bad mum cos I forgot to check his nappy first when he cried or I am sure family are looking at me saying that i don't know what i am doing - In my sane moments I know I am being silly.

It is getting better and the days seem to be slighty further apart so hopefully over the next few weeks you will start to feel better!

Take care!

Hi Honey, we all have those days. You're not a bad mum at all and it doesn't hurt to get a little reassurance from someone when you feel you need it.

Can you ask your oh to look after lo for an hour while you have a soak in the bath? I was just re-reading the thread you started a while ago about embarassing bits during labour, you could try that if it might cheer you up a little. This is the link if you fancy it : http://www.babyexpert.com/chatroom/topic/36381?startnum=1

Sorry if is not what you need but it cheered me up earlier.

Take care Honey, Denise xx

Thanks everyone! Ickleun, thats exactly how I feel. This evening he has not smiled at me once and i feel a bit down about that too...I know im silly! Its just an awkward stage isn't it when they're so young and you dont know whats wrong!! And denise yep that thread cracks me up, I can't believe I had such a big response, at least im not back in labour haha! x

Hi. As everyones said we all have those days. I even had my eldest whos 11 telling me that she has more patience than me yesterday! As far as 6 week checks are concerned Nathans is booked in for week after next, he'll be 9 1/2 weeks then, bloody ridiculous I say.

my lo is 7 months and i still have days like that as all the dec 07 mummies know!!! when things go right finally like tackling naps etc im on top of the world and i feel like a different mummy i relax and everything falls into place simply cause your not stressed and worrying but the min anything didn't go to plan i panic even now! i also have odd days where i have a good cry, but nothing like the first 3 months - i really dont think i had pnd but def had bout of baby blues in the sense of i litrally worried all the time even when lo was asleep and i should be sleeping too in the early days i would sit up and try and work out how i could get more milk in him or when i should try to get him to nap...

ooo you may like to know this - i was at clinic getting lo weighed the other day and a mummy came in with a little baby which was screaming the mum was obviously getting embarrassed and stressed and was looking very hot and bothered, what annoyed me is we have all been there - still are sometimes or though as older slightly easier to distract... but everyone sat staring..so i leaned over and said don't worry he's a tiny baby he's going to have a winge and cry i said just always have a feed half done before you come then finish off while waiting (we sometimes wait hour and half maybe longer), she said thank you what a fantastic idea at least it's something to distract baby so young.........ooo bless her!!!

anyway sorry for ramble!!!
x

I know how you feel, I still worry about a lot of things, but nothing as much anymore as it was in the beginning (Morgana is 9 months now). I don't think I had pnd, but I still have days where I just cry in the evening when everything has gone wrong and just thrust her in her daddy's arms to deal with. I think it's cause we love them so much and want the best for them and it naturally distresses us when they are upset. After all we are only human and there's only so much you can take on some days, having a good cry does help sometimes.

Just wanted to add my voice - I'm on my 4th baby and STILL doubt myself and have really crap days - completely normal hon. Lack of sleep and responsibility creeps up on you like you wouldn't believe so go easy on yourself and take a breather. I get so wound up about things and think about things too much some times that I drive myself mad. Sometimes you just got to accept that you're having a bad day and tomorrow will be better.

Hugsxx

Star11 that was really nice of you....I've been that embarrassed, red faced and sweaty first time mum with a screaming banshee baby and would have loved a few words of comfort! Why does everyone stare at you for having a crying baby when they have pertty much all been in same situation?!

TigerLily, hope you feel better soon hun. You seem to be doing a great job with Gabe. Think we all have days when we feel like a crap mum...I spent pretty much all day yesterday crying my eyes out! I go through phases of thinking I'm doing it all wrong and I'm the worst mum in the world. Still feeling that way today and I get worried as I was quite depressed after my first (not pnd as far as I know).

Any second (or more!) time mums, did you get a pnd assessment after the birth of your second? I haven't had one this time.

xxx

I've never had a PND assessment?!
I get days like this, more lately.
Sometimes I just can't stand it when she is doing the 'half whinge/half cry' thing. I find myself going into another room and just screaming!!!
I'm glad that you wrote this as i'm feeling exactly the same xx

i think we all have bad days hun, i have days when ive been alone with summer all day and she just wont stop crying when i know she not hungary has a clean bum etc etc and eventually she falls asleep on my shoulder bless her, its really hard all this motherhood lark!!!

Hun I hope you are feeling better since you posted....

I have never experienced sooo many rollercoaster of emotions as I have had since Mason was born...I think I felt constantly sick the first few days with him as was just worried about everything. Even before we were mums we all had our good days and bad days and from all the advice you have given me and lots of other people on here I think you are a fantastic mum aswell as a fab person.

Katie and Mason.x x x

Thanks girls, feel so much better today! Thanks sooo much for all ur kind thoughts, you are right we all have bad days. I sometimes feel being a mum is like a big guilt trip...in the nicest way of course. Well today has been better anyway.. x

I never had a PND assessment with my first but with my second I did and failed miserably because my mum had just been diagnosed with cancer!

I thought they did it as a matter of course around the country coz when HV made a visit she was telling me when and how they do it!

I know it sounds silly but this time around being able to come on this site and hearing from everyone has made it sooo much better coz I dont feel I am the only one dealing with situtations!

We all have our off days and its nice to help someone who is having one and also to get support when its your turn! Even though its all about babies on here sometimes its the one place I feel I can really let it all out and not just be "mum, wife, etc etc"

Tiger Lily - am really glad you had a better day! The guilt trip is now gonna last forever now lol. I know coz my 2 eldest make me feel guilty for something on near enough a daily basis lol

Love Lee
xxxxx