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So down at the minute.

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Mummy2aBlueBean
Joined : Sep 09, 2009
Posts : 850
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Posted : Nov 24, 2009 9:43:37 PM
Subject : So down at the minute.

Hi ladies.

Please don't feel as though you have to reply I just needed somewhere to vent as husband is at work.

I suffer from depression and since finding out I was pregnant I have stopped my medication as I didnt want to harm the baby in any way, The thing is for the past few days I have been finding it really hard. I just feel everything is getting on top of me.

I gave up smoking 11 days ago when I was 15 weeks. I feel so guilty now for any damage I could of done to the baby. I get so upset when I think about it as when I was smoking my daughter (11) kept say 'mum what about the baby' but to be honest I didnt really feel pregnant and didnt really believe it but then when I went for my scan at 15 weeks I fell in love with the bean. That was when I gave up. I now have a water infection that gives me a lot of pain in my tummy when I pass water and now I feel guilty about that. I sat here just crying last night when my daughter asked me what was wrong so between sobs I tried to explain about the depression I suffer from. Now I feel guilty about crying all the time as it cant be good for the baby. I have spoken to my GP about it and he offered to put me back on my medication but I really dont want to as I will just feel guilty about that. God I cant win.
I have a counsellor ready for when I have given birth and will be straight back on my medication.
I am so worried about getting post-natal depression and rejecting the baby as I got this with my eldest daughter who is now 15 and we never got that bond.
I keep snapping at my husnband and saying really nasty things. We only got married in August and I told him this morning I wish we hadnt got married. I just sometimes feel we are not suited. He is so laid back that he doesnt react to anything and when he speaks you can hardly hear him. This just really winds me up and then I feel guitly for getting stressed.

Deep down I feel as though I have harmed the baby in some way and something is going to be wrong with him when he is born.
I feel such a failure!!

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Maenad
Joined : Jun 07, 2009
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Posted : Nov 24, 2009 10:06:51 PM

Your GP will be able to steer you towards a medication that is safe to take during pregnancy, failing that he or your midwife should be organising support and 'talking therapy' for you.

Depression is a very real illness, it just doesn't manifest physically. It doesn't make it any dfifferent to any other illness though, and you should not feel guily about getting the appropriate treatment to help you to function.

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Mummy2aBlueBean

Mummy2aBlueBean
Joined : Sep 09, 2009
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Posted : Nov 24, 2009 10:10:12 PM

Thank you MrsSetters x

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icecreamlover
Joined : Jan 18, 2007
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Posted : Nov 24, 2009 10:17:33 PM

I am bf and taking Sertraline for depression. I believe it is also safe to use during pregnancy, and although it might/might not be as strong as the one you were on previously it will still help.
I agree though that you should be receiving some talking therapy right now as well as after the birth, as it will help.

i am like that with my OH sometimes - but he knows i cant help it sometimes. he is similar to your OH - very laid back.

xxx

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manologirl

manologirl
Joined : Oct 16, 2008
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Posted : Nov 24, 2009 10:22:57 PM

Hello hun

Depression is a truly horrible illness to cope with- I had it for some months last year and I know exactly how tough it is to function.

Firstly there is medication you can take safely in pregnancy if you feel you need it. Your GP can also offer counselling on the NHS for up to 16 weeks so ask for that if you think it might help.

I found a book called the Mood cure absolutely wonderful and it really helped me get better. It shows you how nutrition can really improve your wellbeing and address some of the issues connected with depression.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Mood-Cure-Charge-Emotions-Supplements/dp/0007128037

My other tips are simple things, but they can make a big difference.
Firstly get some daylight bulbs for the rooms you spend the most time in, they can have the effect of daylight on your body and boost your mood through winter.
Treat yourself every week and make a big deal out of it, whether its a manicure,a walk in the park and an ice cream or a massage.. make it a ritual and book something in your diary each week. It helps to have nice things to look forward to.
Finally acupuncture can really help with depression too.

Don't feel guilty, if you had a broken leg you wouldn't beat yourself up about it. Depression is simply an imbalance of chemicals in the brain, its not your fault, and it can be cured.

Best of luck

xx

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