Hi ladies,

I don't know if I should be posting on here, but I'm just wondering a few things.
Firstly a quick birth story..

Went into labour on the thurs night, when oh got home I had some bleeding so called labour ward and went in, started getting contractions on the way over there, about 5mins apart from the start. Went to day unit and was assessed and they examined me and I was 4cm so went over to labour ward.
Went outside for a walk and to call some family and they picked up a notch or 2!
After hours on the birthing ball and with the gas and air, I was going to go and get into the water as was 7cm, but then the ward sister said I was too heavy - BMI too high so risk of themnot being able to get me out if needed so the mw said she's run me a bath and they'd pour water on me, by this point though I was layed on the bed which made the pain worse and I started saying I wanted an epidural, which the mw didnt want me to have as Id gone so long wihtout it, but they went and sorted itr out.
Before he did it my waters went and I got alot of pressure on my tummy - was very weird.
After the epidurlal I was strapped up to be monitored and babies heart rate kept dropping a bit with each contraction. When I got to 10cm they gave me another hour for baby to come down before pushing. They they let me push for 45 mins but due to the epidural not alot was happening, so they went to get forceps and did an episiotomy. I could feel an awful lot of yanking as the forceps were put in etc, and after a while my baby girl was born and put on my tummy.
I was stitched up for ages and there waas blood everywehere. They said I lost a lot and I needed to have a drip or iron put in 3 times after the birth and have iron tabs for a month.
After I had her they said when they were feeling my tummy they could tell the baby felt big (she was 9lb 15.5oz) and it scares me to think that if I hadn't had the epidural what the hell would have happened.
My worries are, it took me prob 3 months to heal down there, for the first 6 weeks I was in agony walking to longer than about 10 mins, at times i was in tears it was so painful.
A few days after the birth my mw came ot look at my stitches and they'd opened a bit and my oh had to look at them as i refused to, so he could tell the next mw if it was any better or not. I finally looked and they'd opened alot, and there was talk of me having them re-done but luckily after all this time ive healed. This is what has traumatised me I think.

My questions/worries are -

If I have another baby is there a chance it will be just as big if not bigger?
I was over-weight to start with, but I wondered if I lost weight would that make my chances of having a smaller baby higher?
Would I be monitered during the pregnancy to check the size of the baby?

I'm just so worried I wouldhave to have another episiotomy and then would take even longer ot heal with 2 babies to look after.

Sorry if this post isnt meant for here.
xxx

Hiya there hun,

sorry you're so worried. every birth is different and I don't think anyone can turn around to you and say that 100% you will have an easier time on the second or subsequent births but if it's any help to know other stories ...

My cousin had forceps and ventuce (sp?) with her first child. She was very upset and even had a few nightmares of the birth. She wouldn't talk about it for a while which made things hard on us lot because we just wanted to help make her feel better. She safely delivered her second child not long ago by natural delivery. No stitches at all this time! She's even spoken recently about possible having another one in the future!!

I wouldn't call my second childs birth as tramatic but it was longer and harder then the first one and unlike the first one I had to have stitches which wasn't too much fun!

I'm not sure what the odds of baby size is in relation to the mothers size but there was a show on tele quite a while ago about the largest babies and in that there was a girl who was young and rather small and she had some stupidly large baby.

A friend of mine has had two large kids but according to her it runs in the family ... And another friend who is large has had three very small babies!

Ok I'm rambling now sorry ... hopefully something in there helped

Oh yea and in regards to monitoring ... if you do decide to have another child I would just express your concerns with your midwife and ask for extra checks even if it's just to make you feel more secure.

[Modified by: Bubblez on November 05, 2009 09:30 PM]

Hiya, I know how you feel. My 1st child was 9lb 3oz and I had what would be described as a 'normal' birth. There was nothing 'normal' in my mind about giving birth to such a large baby lol. Anyway that was in 2002 and my 2nd baby is due next month,
I was really traumatised by the birth I hadn't slept for a couple of days because of the pain and only had an injection and gas and air. I begged for the epidural but they told me I was too far gone. I haemorraged when I had my son as I stood off the bed and was torn internally quite bad. I had no stitching or aftercare and was told to go to the loo within ten mins of having him. I also pulled so hard on the backs of my legs during the delivery I ripped my shoulder blade out and needed physio and also to see a gynae as I had totally shot my pelvic floor and tummy muscles. I found it hard walking and couldn't hold him for long as I got back ache and was getting infections internally for the following year,
I was a size 12-14 when I had my son and was the same size this time but have put on a lot less weight, had no cravings etc and am having another boy. I am dreading the birth and would rather get knocked out and have a c-section I'm just hoping the birth will be quicker but I'm not holding my breath. My nephew was over 10lb and my brother 2 wks prem was still 7.5lbs I'll let you know how big baby is xjx

Thank you for your replies.

Oh Smoochiegal what a tough time you had, I really hope that this birth goes well for you. I will look out for you - are you in the due in Dec? I guess I'm holding out that no two births are the same.
Have you explained your worries to your mw?
I really hope it goes well for you xx