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why is this happening to me again!Update again

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MrsCCarter
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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 4:51:51 PM
Subject : why is this happening to me again!Update again

Hi Ladies
Looks like I am going to be back after getting my BFP on sunday I tested today again and BFN!
I can't believe this is happening to me again and now just waiting for the bleeding to start.
I dont know if I can face this again, the line was so clear on sunday but today doubt started to creep in and so I tested again and there isn't even the faintest line there.
Last time I drew comfort from it being our first BFP and so I thought at least we know our bits work now at least, now with this being the second time all I can think is that there must be something wrong with me!
I was so sure this was it this time, its taken all my strength all day not to start crying in work.
I dont think I can do this again
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Morning
Thanks to everyone for your support, I tested again this morning with FMU and there was a line but it was the faintest line ever which makes me think that my hormone levels are dropping. I wish I hadnt tested now as would be ignorantly in bliss!
This is exactly like last time so I am just waiting for the bleeding to start now, I don't feel like I am going to come on or have any pains like I did last time but this might just be a matter of time.
I would give anything for bean to be just having a bit of a nap and will suddenly swing into action but I think in reality its over
Thanks again for all your lovely messages of support it really means alot
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Well still no bleeding but I did another test on sunday morning and BFN so I guess its over for me! Had strange pulling sensation across my belly button over the weekend and yesterday I was so tired and had a headache all day, if I hadnt of tested again I would swear I was still pregnant but I did test again and the BFN is all thats needed really to tell me that I have had another chem pg!
Last time I had started to bleed already by this point but still no sign and I dont even feel like its on its way but Im sure it will turn up soon no doubt! As if my body was being cruel enough it looks like it is going to mess me around with AF as well!
I just feel so sad and numb, I am being really sharp with Hubby but I can't help it! I am just so angry and bitter that this has happened again, all I can think is why me! Selfish I know!
To have 2 chem pgs in under 3 months as well, I can't help but think that there is something wrong with me, what if I will never be able to carry a baby!
I am going to leave it a few days and then go to the doctors, last time I went when I was having the chem pg she just sent me away with a 'lets see what happens in a week' so I am not going to waste my time.
If I have started to bleed by then then I know its a chem pg, if I havent then I will need to know whats going on in there.
Just needed to get this out
x


[Modified by: MrsCCarter on 09 November 2009 09:44:46 ]

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rocky_kiz

rocky_kiz
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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 4:55:36 PM

hey hun, i just want to ask what tests you used and did you use FMU for both? people have ahd this before! it's poss to get a false negative for several reasons. x

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MrsCCarter

MrsCCarter
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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 5:09:23 PM

Hi
I used superdrug tests, on sunday I used FMU but the afternoon I tested twice. First time I stupidly tested within 40 mins of having a wee and drinkin a glass of water so I thought maybe the BFN was due to wee being too dilated. So I waited 2.5 hrs with no drink n no weeing and still got BFN! There isnt even a faint line, I am about 16-17 dpo so I would have thought that a BFP would show up at anytime of the day at this stage.
I think I am just going to have to prepare myself for the worst
x

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DangerMouse

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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 6:01:48 PM

Oh hun, don't give up hope yet. Do you literally POAS or collect it an a pot? I tend to collect mine then I can see if its very dilute - I only use if its dark enough. Like Rocky says this could be a false negative, fingers crossed for you xx

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DangerMouse

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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 6:01:48 PM

Double post - sorry

[Modified by: DangerMouse on November 04, 2009 08:42 PM]

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Lottie+Neve

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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 8:35:19 PM

MrsCCarter I am so sorry to read this, could you get an emergency appointment at your doctors tomorrow, explain what has happened and ask for a Beta HCG to measure your hcg levels? I'm sure if you explain what happened in September they will help.

I hope this is just a little blip and the news is good.
xxx

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laujai

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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 8:35:47 PM

Hi sweetie,

I agree with the others that it could be a false negative, I think you should maybe try fmu & see what happns.

I really hope that it's not happening again hun, having been through it several times I really feel for you.

Were all here for you & keeping everything crossed that it's a just a bit shy xxx

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gemgems13

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Posted : Nov 04, 2009 8:47:15 PM

oh hun I really hope this is just a scare and things turn out ok for you. but whichever way things go you know we're all here for you either way.
Gems
xx

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jls1976
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Posted : Nov 05, 2009 9:15:56 AM

Hi Mrs Carter
I agree that a trip to the Dcs would be a good idea, HPT arnt fool proof so get your HGC tested at least that way you know for sure - Im thinking of you as are all the girls on here X

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HappyTraveller

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Posted : Nov 05, 2009 9:51:30 AM

Hi Mrs Carter,
I've nothing really to add to the good advice the other ladies have given, but I've my fingers crossed for you and am thinking of you xx

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jls1976
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Posted : Nov 05, 2009 11:01:33 AM

Hang on in there Mrs C - have you booked an app at the doctors yet - all this stress cant be good for you - Im sending loads of sticky baby dust and praying for you X

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MrsCCarter

MrsCCarter
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Posted : Nov 05, 2009 11:10:10 AM

I haven't booked a docs appt yet, my docs is stupid and I can only get an appointment on the same day so it would mean messing work around and I got alot of grief when I was off last time with chem pg! I have decided to see what happens over the weekend, I havent started to bleed and I dont feel like its on its way nor have I had any pain. If this happens over the weekend then I know then that I have had another chem pg, if nothing happens then I will go the docs on monday and ask for a blood test. Either way I am going to the docs on monday either to discuss the pregnancy or the chem pg.
I wish I hadnt tested again really and that I was still in ignorant bliss coz today I feel more pregnant than ever! my stomach feels so tight right across my belly button-like pulling and i feel sickly on and off ! So I hope this is a good sign and not me kidding myself!
Thanks for all your well wishes
xx

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MrsPies

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Posted : Nov 05, 2009 11:35:41 AM

Oh i'm sorry. Lets hope little bean is having a nap. Hormones do fluctuate. Fingers crossed for you x x

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gussie
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Posted : Nov 05, 2009 10:30:28 PM

i agree with the other ladies, i wish you loads of luck will keep my fingers crossed!

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wigzy

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Posted : Nov 09, 2009 9:50:28 AM

Im sorry 2 hear this is happeing Mrs C but I agree with the other girls, hang in there!! Everything crossed for you hun xx

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jls1976
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Posted : Nov 09, 2009 10:39:41 AM

Hi Mrs C

Was thinking of you this weekend, I hope you are doing ok XX

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MrsCCarter

MrsCCarter
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Posted : Nov 09, 2009 11:11:49 AM

Thanks for your support everyone it really means alot.
Even though theres been no bleeding yet I think I have resided myself to the fact that this pregnancy is over and I am just waiting now.
Its even harder this time because I drew comfort from the 1st time by saying that at least we knew we could make a baby but now this has happened again and I am scared that is there is something wrong with us. I've been franicially googling about miscarriages and scaring myself with all the facts, stupid I know!
I just wish I knew what was going on
x

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jls1976
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Posted : Nov 09, 2009 11:15:03 AM

Mrs C

Dont you think its time to get to the doctors, I dont mean to be pushy but this stress is very hard on your body, I think you need to find out ASAP so you can either have a healthy pregnancy and stop worrying or (and Im praying this isnt the outcome) find out why it has happened agin - I praying for good news for you X

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MrsCCarter

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Posted : Nov 09, 2009 11:37:33 AM

Hey jls1976
Last time I had my chem pg and went to the doctors I was kinda fobbed off! The doc was lovely but just said that I was to wait n see what happens!
With only being 5 weeks today I know its too early to be offered a scan and when I tell her that I have now got a BFN yesterday she will say that its looks like a failing pregnancy and send me on my way again! she wouldnt give me a blood test before so I doubt she would this time!
At being 22 dpo if the pregnancy was progressing then I wouldnt be getting BFN with FMU so I know its over really! Just want to give it a few days to see what happens and let nature take its course I guess! I'm in no pain and it that changes then I will be straight at the docs!
I guess I dont want to go to the docs to be told something that I already know
x

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laujai

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Posted : Nov 09, 2009 11:49:11 AM

Im really sorry this is happening again sweetie. I know you have had a BFP & now BFN but with my 1st pg I didnt get a BFP till 2 missed AF's later, I wonder if your hcg is a little slow in developing!!!
If the worst does happen hun make sure your GP documents it hun, they may be able to arrange some blood work for you.

Sending you lots of love & hugs xxx

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ShellShell

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Posted : Nov 09, 2009 11:49:43 AM

I really hope you get the outcome you want. Do go to your doctors though to get it recorded on your notes. xxx

ps some ladies positive bfps don't show for weeks!

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