Hey ladies,

i dont know if you remember me, i actually requested this board months ago when i was told i needed ICSI, (and then told i didnt) well it seems that i might be heading back here again following my consult today, Ive posted over in long term, but thought id pop on here to say hello and also to get any opinion's, particually on the IUI, any thoughts?

Hope you are all well (as can be) i will try and catch up with your situations, although i havent been on that much recently cos, ive been a miserable old cow.

well, i had my consult today, it was a very mixed day. I was really happy with the consultation but still ended up balling my eyes out. i think it was the stressful past few months coupled with the realisation that I AM INFERTILE! and finally facing up to the fact that IVF is looking likely. Plus my consultant was lovely and said all the right things and you know when somebody gives you a bit of sympathy you go all silly, well i idid cos i wasnt expecting him to be so lovely and i started welling up!

Bascially a run down of what was discussed.

* Impotence... he said, very very common when ltttc, try not to stress, but jhe understands ust telling me that is stressful and he said others telling me is counter productive as they dont understand my situation (which was lovely to him say!) He said we're doing all the right things, but that if hubbie wants to go and talk about it he can, also he has booked us an appointment with the fertility counsellor to discuss this aswell as other issues, re ivf etc.

* Clomid... he is happy with my progress overall, said im responding brilliently, but acknowledged that this is no good to me if im not preggant! He said I am in total control of this and he is happy to support me either way. He said i can come of for a few months and give us a break, or continue for either 6 months but could do up to a year. He said its up to me but he questioned if i could put myself through it for another 9 months and also said dont feel like you have to persue it, 6 months is a fair shot and you have to do whats right for you.

IVF.... He said that he would support my application from this decemeber when my local PCT guidlines change. Now i should really have been trying 3 years but he said 17 months is plenty considering my circumstances and he would recommend me. He said if i go on the list i will have to be treated within 18 weeks!!!! I couldnt believe it, this was the biggest surprise of the day, i was ready to have to fight for IVF when the times comes but to be told, "your a special case, you need this now" came as a bit of a shocker.... (hence the tears) I guess somewhere in the back of my mind i was hoping he would say, "dont be ridiculous, your no where near that stage yet!" But hearing him saying it made me face up to the fact that this really happening to me!
He said, whenever i wanted to go on the list he would support me, but he reminded me it was a radcial procedure and it would take me away from the more natural methods, but he kept reminding me this was my choice and i was clearly desperate and i have to do whats right for me.
He was lovely telling me time is on my side (im nearly 32!)

Lastly IUI.... I asked about his views, i know people have mixed veiws about its success, he was really really postive and said although the success rates are low he would still recomend as it' so less stressful, and radcial than IVF/ ICSI, and if i could afford it (its private) then i will likely feel better about at least trying everything availble before heading down the IVF route. I tend to agree, and now i know that i will get at least one free cycle i feel slighty better at throwing £2000 at iui (if you can understand that!)

Laslt thing.. hubby booked in for another SA just to make sure we know what were dealing with!

So that was my very eventful consult, i feel a bit overwhelmed but in some ways more positve, i can now make a plan and it will be more or less on my terms... woo hoo..

Im thinking , Finish the year on clomid (you never know) Then early next year a couple of rounds of IUI, and if still no success IVF in the spring/ summer? I dont dont even want to think past then, but seems like a plan eh?

Anybody got any views, postive or neg, i dont mind.

Hugs..

Gemma xxx

Baby dust to you all..

Hi Gem

It sounds like you have had one hell of a day - stressful, but probably an important milestone?

It's brilliant news about the IVF treatment. Like you, we have this as our fallback option too, assuming four rounds of IUI don't work. I am in the 2ww of round 2 of IUI, and I know what you mean about the success rates not being all that encouraging. I think rates are better for medicated cycles, so that might mean a continuation of the clomid, with regular scans to track your follicles (each clinic has a slightly different approach). If you are used to stimulating your ovaries anyway, then I don't think you'll find IUI all that invasive. The regular scans are not brilliantly convenient, but it is nice to get reassurance that follicles are growing. And the insemination itself is a cross between a smear and a straightforward HSG.

As for tears - I think they are a therapeutic and inevitable part of this whole process - I say let them out!! I hope Mr Gem is looking after you this evening. Take care of yourself.

Best of luck

xx

Thanks Mrs D,

I know what a long post I wrote! As soon as i'd written it, I read your posts re: IUI, thanks for writing it all up, it so informative, gave me a much better idea of what to expect. I know about the sucess rates but still, you cant help but hope can you? I really hope it's 2nd time lucky for you.

Can I ask, are you paying privately? I know different PCT have different guidelines. I think paying privately we would realistically only be able to afford 2 goes and then perhaps have our free IVF go, and then if still unsucessful save again for another round!

Lets hope it doesnt get that far!

Thanks again, I'll look out for your post,

Gem x

Hey Gem honey...welcome back over here, although sorry you've had to join us. It sounds like your appt was really positive overall. Sounds like he was very helpful and it's really nice to come out with some options in my experience. You sound much more positive now that you have a plan. We were offered the option of IUI, but I personally would prefer to go the whole hog and do IVF in the first place. However, our circumstances are different and if your hubbie's s/a comes back all good then IUI has a reasonable chance from what I've read. It's so good that the guidelines are changing in your favour honey. I am still 3 yrs off so hoping I will never qualify for it now! It really is great that you have a plan now sweetie, and I really hope that you don't need to get to the IVF stage in the end. xxx

[Modified by: tinybabydancer on October 22, 2009 11:37 PM]

Wow, what an amazing consultant - so nice to be treated like a human being by someone who understands!

It's great that you have a plan, and I really hope the IUI works for you. There's no doubt that IVF is much more invasive and definitely takes over your life while it's going on - though TBH I think any form of fertility treatment does to a greater or lesser extent, and the really intense part of IVF only lasts for a week or two. It'll all be worth it in the end, though, when we have our babies. xx

Hi Gem

Of course I don't mind you asking sweetie. Based on our ages (me 35 and MrD 37) and the fact we are TTC our first, our PCT does four rounds of IUI on the NHS. We have been advised that doing them back to back will improve our chances (?). If that doesn't work, then we get IVF on the NHS - either one or two rounds, need to check which. I know we are very, very lucky to be offered all this treatment on the NHS.

If none of the NHS treatment works, then we will go for privately financed IVF.

x

Thanks for your replys ladies,

Mrs D, 4 free goes, thats amazing, That must at least take some of the stress out. Its so wrong that people have to be worried about that aswell on top of everything else, i think everybody should be entitled to at least their 3 free ivf cycles. I really gets me that the nhs pay for smokers, drinkers, and overeaters for thier life span and not for people with this heartbreaking medical illness over which we have no control.

Tiny Baby Dancer, Yes, Mr B, but like you dont like to say too much. I think he's been great so far, hope youve had the same expereince.

LDOM, Yes lovely consultant, feel in safe hands, and that he really understands. Makes it all a little easier.

Speak to you all soon... fingers crossed for my last few months of clomid.. ive booked a posh resturant tomorrow night for a 'romantic evening' with hubbie.... well you never know

Gem x

Hey Gem, yes v psoitive overall.

I agree 100% about the funding. It really really is pants!

Enjoy tom evening - sounds lovely. Hope it helps you towards that BFP sweetie xx

GEM78, we have recently been referred to St. Barts by our consultant for IVF and we are waiting to hear about our first appointment which should hopefully be before Christmas where we'll have to go through all the tests again, have counselling and speak and decide on a plan of action (a full days appointment apparently). We've been told the waiting list is now 3.5/4 months after that so falls just outside the 18 week guideline in total I guess. Do you know what hospital you will be referred to have your IVF at?

Hi Gem

Hope you are ok.

I just wanted to add that we have recently got our BFP (4 + 6 so early days but fingers crossed) on our third cycle of IUI + clomid 50mg.

I know the success rates aren't great but it can happen!!

Lougla - we had our treatment at Barts and my advice is keep on top of them - the clinic can be notoriously difficult to contact and we found emailing one of the nurse co-ordinators directly was the most effective way of getting our appointments / scans etc booked.

S x