hello just wondered what yours & your oh's opinion on discipline was? our dd is 16 months old is just starting to test the boundries, if she does something naughty I just say no & then just distract her from what she's doing sometimes it works other times it doesn't, oh has come in from work saying his colleagues tap thief Los hand or tap their bum, I think she is far too young for this & personally don't want to do this at all, just wondered what ur opinions were? thanks

I'm trying the naughty step at the moment - sometimes it works, sometimes not. It's early days though, lo is only 21 months. Quite often just saying no and removing him from the situation does the trick.
Don't have anything against smacking as a rule, as long as it's not abused, just don't really fancy doing it myself.

toby is aslo starting to push the boundries i just say no move him away and try to disctract him if he hits or bites which he is aslo doing i just say no thats not nice .oh thinks we should tap his hand but i think that all that would do is to teach toby smacking is ok.

My lo is 2 1/2 and I know the naughty step would be a waste of time. I find removal of toys / priviledges works well but I have to give him the choice. e.g. your choice is you stop this and we stay in the park or you continue and we go straight home. You HAVE to be willing to carry out your threat. We are having problems with him wanting to be carried everywhere by me so when he starts I get down to his level and explain that his choices are to walk nicely or go in the buggy. It seems to work for us. I must admit though I did slap him for the first time the other day. I wasn't feeling that great and he decided that day was the first day he would try to continually slap Mummy. By lunch time I lost it and he slapped me so I slapped him back (a tap more than a slap). We were both a bit stunned but I just said 'See it hurts when you do that doesn't it?' He looked up gave me a cuddle and has not slapped me since. I think maybe a little tap very occaisionally may have it's place.

I am quite strict on disapline as i would feel i had failed as a mother if my child/ren grew up like a lot of the 'monsters' today(sorry feel quite strongly on this).
She has no but she does get tapped if something is going to hurt her or she has done something repeatidly.

I am not saying beat a child but personally i feel a tap has its place and its up to the adult in charge to judge the situation.

xxxx

I have the book Toddler Taming by Dr Christopher Green and I highly recommend it. His theory is disipline not punishment.

Buy it - it's available on Amazon with free delivery. It is not patronising at all.

As for hitting kids - i don't believe in it unless the child is in real danger and will not listen to you - so a tap on the hand or bum may be called for. And I mean a tap not a slap or punch!

I find the double standards of some parents very frustrating too. At toddler group a while ago a lo (who has now started school) was having a big paddy and slapped his mum on the arm. So she grabbed him, slapped his bum and said "don't hit mummy". Now, can anyone tell me how confusing that must be for the child involved??!!

I feel quite strongly about discipline too. I don't think enough children are disciplined appropriatly in this country and thats why society is the way it is today too!!
My mum and dad's word ruled when I was a child, yet I was never hit and I never feared my parents either. I respected them (still wouldn't dare speak out of turn at 34!!) and I was taught manners (p's & q's as my mum called them)

With Shea now 2, he does test the boundaries. A naughty step is too early at his age I believe, he wouldn't stay there!!.
He has had a "tap" on the hand for pulling his hand away from mine and trying to run into the road!! but I find the most effective method is removal from the situation, removing of toys etc and also ignoring him, for instance, he kicked me the other day when I was changing him, quite hard too and it bloody hurt. but I obviously wasn't going to kick him back! So I got up told him he's hurt mummy and mummy was upset and I walked out of the room. He didn't like that one bit, came running through asked for "big hug" gave me a kiss and said "soz mum"

This discipline work is hard!! but I think consistency is the key and also being ready to carry out your "threats"!!!

I bought that book ccbmommy, i got it from the Asda baby event the last time it was on for £7, best get my nose stuck into it now that Lucy is a tinker of a toddler!

Hello

My little boy Lochlan is pushing the boundries too!! hes 11 months old and he laughs at me when i say no, I tap his hand if he touches the ironing board, or if he tries to touch the oven just a light tap as im afraid he will hurt himself, the other day I screamed because within a split second of him running in the kitchen in his walker he pulled the iron off the ironing board and it just missed his head its a heavy steam generated one, I tapped his hand and shouted because i was so shaken up he got a fright aswell with my scream, he STILL trys to touch it!