I am so angry and upset it is unbelievable. My husband was out last night with some friends and one of them has never been my favourite person, I've never really got on with him, but I've kind of just tollerated him for the last few years. Well last night they all came round to get hubby and he was asking how the pregnancy was going, his wife had a baby a couple of months ago so he was asking if I was taking folic acid and I said I was and he was asking if I was eating right and getting plenty of sleep and if I'd had any sickness and then started going on about what I should be doing and that I shouldn't be doing anything (I was getting a drink), so I said "thanks for your concern, but I'm not ill, I'm pregnant, it's not 1930, the advic isn't to be on complete bed rest for 9 months like it was then and I pointed out that I have been pregnant before" and he actually turned round and said to me "yeah and look at what happened then"!!!!!!! (as in my last pregnancy ended in a still birth).

At the time I was just amazed he'd said it and told hubby to get them out and the more I've thought about it the more it's annoyed me. Hubby didn't hear it and I only told him about it today and he's fuming!

Am I being unreasonable to be so annoyed?? xxxxxx

No, that's utterly disgusting and I would be completely furious as well.

Does your husband seriously still want to hang around with someone that callously tactless? I hope not.

I agree with Mrs Setters - it is shocking how rude some people are! :-( You are definitely not being unreasonable to be annoyed! I would be fuming too and probably expect my hubby to stop hanging around with people like that! Some people just haven't got a clue....

OMFG you have every right to be angry and upset - how insensitive. I'll bet his wife would have been fuming too if she'd heard.
I hate it when people think they know everything and can tell you what to do just because they've done it! Every pregnancy and body and is different and since when has complete inactivity been proven to prevent anything happening? I bet he didn't let his wife do nowt for 9 months!

Hubby has said he wants nothing more to do with him again.

I've calmed down a bit now, but I think what annoyed me is for months after losing the baby I blamed myself and tried to work out what I had done wrong and it was like he was insinuating I had done something wrong and it was my fault. xxxxxx

Hiya Vicki

Just picked up my jaw from the ground!! What an I D I O T!

So sorry you have had to tolerate this silly man.

Very pleased hubby shares your thoughts on this. What an AWFUL thing to say...

Enjoy your pregnancy... and steer clear of these sorts of people. He has obv never had to cope with loss.

Rachel xx

OMG! What an igit >:( now that gyy needs a smack in the face how rude and upsetting of him to say that. GRRRRRRRRR!

Sweety, i hope you do realise that it was not your fault that your previous pregnancy ended in a still birth?
The bloke is obviously an idiot, and a horrible person who knows nothing.xxxx

I read this, and was so utterly gobsmacked, i couldn't not reply!! What happened to your first little angel was absolutely tragic, but i am certain there is nothing you could have done to change it.

Please don't listen to that insensitive, inconsiderate, spineless, wretch of a creature that calls himself a man (and a dad?!). xx

Wow, it never ceases to amaze me how cruel and stupid some people are.

I really hope one day it dawns on him just how cold and ignorant his words were, I am even more sorry for any of his children. It is wonderful to hear your dh is supportive, and well if you ever run this guy over in your car, I'd alibi you :) . Please please do not let this snuggle down and grow in your mind. You are a wonderful mum, and are doing the best you can. You are not to blame for what happened to your precious angel, and I hope you can take some small comfort in knowing that every moment you had together, your baby knew just how much you loved them.

xx

OMG what a complete and utter twat! I can sadly believe it though - the stupid things that were said to me after my daughter died defy belief. Hope you're ok hon - good for your dh giving him the elbow. People like that drag you down - you have enough to deal with how you're feeling without idiots like that adding to it.xx

OMG what a complete and utter twat! I can sadly believe it though - the stupid things that were said to me after my daughter died defy belief. Hope you're ok hon - good for your dh giving him the elbow. People like that drag you down - you have enough to deal with how you're feeling without idiots like that adding to it.xx

utterly disgusting - i am actually stuck for words - and that doesnt happen very often! xx

i cant get over a man saying that to you. has he ever carried a baby to full term? has he ever experienced a still birth?? i dont know where he gets off giving you advice, just because his wife had a baby, that makes him a gynacologist?? i absolutely despise men who have a tendancy of saying things like that! they need a good kick in the balls. he had no right on earth to say anything to you, he was there for your husband, not to annoy your head. grr, feckin men!

he has no brain hun people say terrible things all the time dont worry about simple minded people i'm into my 6th week after losing charlie and people are still stopping me asking where IT is (IT) it was a he and a beautiful baby he was , or they say have you had it , please i look half dead i've lost 3 stone in 6 weeks and am not pushing a pram , i'm going to get a t shirt printeed telling people my baby has died and to leave me alone !!
hope your ok and feeling well take care love vicki x

Omfg, cant believe i just read that! What a loser, dont listen to a word he says. That is utterley disgusting that he said that and i would be fuming aswell. People like that are bloody clueless!
Hope you are ok, it was never your fault and what right does he have to think he knows best, bloody idiot! xx

oMG, i can't believe anyone with half a heart or braincell could say! sounds like a complete prick! of course it wasn't ur fault and he's a complete arsewipe for suggesting it. i feel sorry for his girlfriend, she must've spent the whole 9 months chained to her bed and treated like an invalid. and too right ur hbby shouldn't wanna see him again, totally disgusting. what a cock!

i know it's hard but try to put that knob head and his comments out of ur mind

xx