I feel like I am going mad! Just watched the Katie Price interview and couldn't stop crying. Then watched Katie and Peter Stateside (might have a reality TV problem!) and cried through that. Am feeling frustrated with DH at the moment, not feeling good about myself blah blah blah. Could all be PMT symptoms (AF due next week) but have been feeling really thirsty, have a metalic taste in my mouth and my sense of smell has gone through the roof - these were all symptoms of my last pregnancy.

So stupidly I POAS 10DPO and unsurprisingly got a BFN, however, not before I stared at the test so much that I almost convinced myself there was a faint line before having to give myself a telling off. I think this TTC is finally sending me Ga Ga! Despite this, I still remain hopeful that I tested too early and I will get my BFP at the end of next week (why do we set ourselves up for disappointment every month?)

On top of this am annoyed at DH who continues to smoke like a trooper despite me saying it does not help the whole process. What is the point of me keeping fit and healthy if he might be providing damaged goods. Plus, what is the point in having a child if you are intent on smoking yourself into an early grave! And then there is the fact that we both work such different hours that we are both tired when the other one isn't - not a good recipe for BDing-I sometimes feel like a sex pest whilst trying to keep the whole thing about sex rather that TTC (but in realitiy most of my day is taking up with thoughts of TTC!) ARGHHHHHHHH. I feel like I should concentrate more on living my life and being happy with what I have, rather that pinning all my happiness on having a baby, but easier said than done when you have been given a glimpse of how completely happy you felt being PG. Feel better for writing this all down. Sorry for the moan.

Oh honey,

Hang on in there, its not over yet!!! I'm sure you can work something out with dh on the bd'ing front, my dh works 12/13 hour shifts and we managed it, you just have to be creative!!! Sorry can't comment on the smoking front but understand your frustration.

Good luck xxx

I have to admit I cried at the Katie Price interview 2 but only because it touched a bit of a raw nerve as we had to have a d+c last tues and still waiting for the bleeding to stop. your hormones will still be doing lots of things which could help to explain a bit of the emotions, 10dpo is early to test fingers crossed its just too early hun xxx

hi hun, sorry you're feeling sad. i think the crazy baby lady gets us all from time to time. my hubby works late and came home at 1.30 in the morning and i was too tired to bd and i started screaming at him that if i didn't get bfp this month it would be all his fault!! i have also been known to look at pg tests in 'good light' near a window and also snap them open to get a really good look at the strip when i'm sure i've seen a line!! madness!! fingers crossed you've tested early and a bfp is on its way to you xx