Hi, my son will be 3 in November and due to start nursery. We recently had a letter from them inviting us to a meeting and to look round etc. On the end of the letter was a little note saying that the kids must be confident in using the toilet because nursery staff don't change nappies or help with the toilet.
Is this what usually happens?
My son is not ready to be potty trained yet and even though its a few months away I'm beginning to get a bit stressed and I feel rushed.
Anybody else?
Vic xxx

I didnt think they were allowed to discriminate anymore, I know when my eldest (who is 13 now) started nursery they were allowed to do that but things have changed in the last few years, Nurserys prefer children to be potty trained as it is easier for them but round where I live the nurseries all take children still in nappies, the only thing they dont do is disposed of them so if your child does need changing then they give you the nappy to take home, phone your local lLEA or PLA to find out the rulings.

They do accept them still in nappies now, though I think they prefer if they are toilet trained.

My mil looks after a little boy who wasn't toilet trained until 3. He is 4 now and still needs help with going to the toilet for a no. 2 as do most 4 year olds and I think nursery still helps him with that xx

I have also heard that they arnt allowed to discriminate any more. I would deff challenge them about it.

they are allowed to take them as potty training is done much later now xx

Hi,
my daughter goes to pre-school, (2 different ones) I know its not the same as nursery its only mornings, but they were both fine with nappies and also help her with the toilet, I also didnt think they could discriminate now. Have you tried another nursery,as this is just putting stress and pressure on you, your LO will use the toilet when they're ready you dont need extra stress about it, my daughter was 3 and 1 month before she was out of nappies, I didnt think she'd ever get out of them! she was scared of the toilet! x

i worked at a school nursery about 3 years ago at that time the nursery i worked for would take them in nappies but if they pooed would't change them would phone the parents to come and do it'. the only time they would take a child in nappies and change them is if the child had special needs

Our school nursery wont take them until they are out of nappies. Timothy went to the playgroup at the school when he was 2 and they would change nappies but at the nursery where he started when he was 3 they had to be toilet trained which fortunately he was. Your son just wont be able to start til hes trained. The school is well within their rights to refuse to take children in nappies im afraid x

I'm fairly sure that nurseries are not allowed to NOT take them just because they're still in nappies and the majority of 3 year olds that I know certainly wouldn't be able to wipe themselves properly. School is obviously another matter as the adult to child ratios are different along with the job descriptions of the people that work in schools. My DS was late to toilet train (started on his 3rd birthday), was in a nursery and at a pre school before he was dry and they were cool with changing him. I think your best bet is to call the head of the nursery and arrange a time to go and chat to them, explain your concerns and find out if it's just their preference or policy not to take children in nappies.

I work in a nursery and they are not allowed to discrimate. I would phone the staff and speak to someone and explain your worries. Is it a privateor council run nursery?

My daughter starts nursery in September at the school she will be going to, and they don't change nappies either. I thought that if it was a school nursery that was standard practise?
xx

Under the Disability Discrimination Act (2005) they are unable to refuse entry because of lack of toilet-training due to a disability. However, in an early years setting you are able to argue that 'development delay' is a disability and any child can be protected by this Law. They may not have flat-lying facilities for nappy changing but should accept pull-up style nappy training pants, which can be changed in a standard cubicle.

http://www.surestart.gov.uk/_doc/P0002348.pdf

http://www.teachers.org.uk/resources/word/CONTINENCE-TOILET-IN-SCHOOLS-0209_SL.doc

Thanks for all your replys. It is a school nursery he'll be attending. He's due to start probably in Jan/ Feb next year. They've said that they don't change nappies but they will change his clothes if he has an accident but if its a no. 2 they usually phone someone to come and either change him or take him home to get cleaned up.
I know he's not a baby any more but even when he's 3 I don't think he'll be capable of wiping his bum properly.
xxx

My lil one is starting a school nursery in september also and they have said they wont accept children still in nappys either. I was really worried about this as he has a problem with going for a poo at the toilet (some sort of fear) in fact he's just been referred to the hospital as i was so concerned about it, so i'm really grateful this issue has been raised! and thanks pretty sprinkles for the info, at least now if needed i've got some back up!!x

My son had to be toilet trained before starting the school nursery. I also think that this is standard practice.

The teachers were more than happy to change him if he had an accident. Which he didn't he had been out of nappies for almost a year.

I think that they assist with the bum wiping?! I would ask about this if you have any worries

xx

wow this has really got me worried now, sam is starting nursery at the local primary school, next october. im hoping he will be toilet trained by then...hes not started yet but this has really got me thinking i should start!!

i seriously think though that any nursery staff should be trained to and should change nappies. there is no law that says all kids under a certain age are toilet trained...they all go at their own pace. its rather shocking to be honest, i cant believe your being rushed like this xx